Monday, January 19, 2009

Father's Day: fact or fiction?

Holidays are douche bag reasons to sit at home, stuff your face with artery cloggin' cuisine, & shamelessly spend money. Simple & plain.

They otherwise provide little to zero enlightenment on the supposedly special day. Take your pick & prove me wrong;

Mother's, Father's, Christmas, Veteran's, Labor, & Halloween doesn't count.

MLK, Hannakah & Kwaanza get a pass, because I have actually learned a few things about them once I stopped being so one-sided.

Now let's look at Father's Day. An odd, if even celebrated day to praise the Man who makes all things possible. Before we go further, immedietely exclude those individuals who have no right even acting like the day belongs to them. You are dismissed, see you next session.

& just like that, at least half of the faces disappear. I suck at math, so there's a huge possibility that it's far more than a 50% margin. Yikes, to say the least.

I have a Father, with a capital F, because it's a title he earned fervently. He happens to be my dad as well, which today, is a sweet bonus to the deal. I thank God everyday that the psychopathetic (yes, crazy+sad) tendencies of my mom didn't drive him away long ago. Quite frankly, I might've left. I've said it as a child, & I'll stand by it today; my Dad can kick your dad's ass anyday of the week. Word to Jur-El.

That's Superman's pops.

Now, here I am, a man raised by a man who choose to give a damn about his family. I've never seen him unemployed. He showed up at every school function I've ever been involved in. He knew all of my teacher's on a first name basis. He checked my homework. He spanked me so bad once that I never, ever ever, did what I did again in life. He ate metal, drank fire, & saved kittens from trees. Dude was, is, & always will be the most awesome superhero the world has never heard of.

So, its only natural I emulate what I experienced growing up. I believe that kids eventually do what they choose to, but the stronger the foundation, the safer the building. I'm living proof of that philosophy.

However ridiculous as it sounds, I don't even take Father's day seriously. Probably because it's barely recognized around me. I'm not even quite sure what the date of it is. Come to think of it, I doubt I've ever seen a commercial for it. It's no more important to me than my birthday. Maybe it should be.

I'm a real father, the quintessential clone of my father's, & his father's behavior in regard to their offspring. Some say I spoil my children. I ask those people where are their kids? That usually forces a subject change.

I make it a point to hug, kiss, & teach my children as much as possible. I don't lie to them about anything, especially my mistakes. That has got to be the worst way for demons to haunt a parent. Their whole fiasco could've been avoided if the kid's were aware of "unsafe sex" or "just one drink". In a perfect world, knowledge & wisdom would fall out of the sky, or have it's own TV show everynight after dinnertime. No dice. It's buried in boring books, & hidden in the innuendos & insinuations of anonymous people traveling through life. If you're lucky, one of them will stop & help you along your journey. That's where a Dad steps in.

A kind word, a gentle touch from a father is more powerful than any force on Earth. On the opposite end of the sprectrum, the sentence "I'm disappointed" has caused my kids far more tear shedding than any extension cord or switch could ever. Feelings & emotions trump belts & backhand slaps any day of the week, bet that.

For any adults out there who won't admit how much not having their dad there hurts, I apologize for them. I'm sorry. & a lot of women don't know how to handle it when a man isn't willing to just throw them under the bus, because that's all they know. To those men who have the unfortunate situation of having children with a woman like that (me included), I also apologize for those women. I'm sorry. I'm one of those men as well, so I'm going to also give myself a hug.

No matter what life hurls in my general direction, I vow before God to be there for my kids as much as humanly possible. That's all I know. Anything else would be disrespectful to the morals my father planted in me. Or as Charles Barkley would say, "uncivilized".

I refuse to be embarassed like Shaquille O'Neal's dad, on national TV being called a deadbeat.

Maybe that's why I don't really but into the Fathers Day hype. I know that its basically a thankless job, but take a look around. Somebody's got to do it. Why not me?