Villain Wanted

Wanted: the proverbial bad guy-a "villain", to assume all the responsibilities of Hip Hop's requisite antagonist, and fill position of necessary cultural scapegoat. Must be arrogant, ignorant, smug, materialistic, slightly psychotic with glimmers of brilliance and remorse. Must have a violent and/or criminal background (preferably authentic) and suffer from one (1) or more mental illnesses-ideally some form of post traumatic stress disorder. Must be goal-oriented, and possess at least a basic concept of song writing ability and melody recognition. Ability to harmonize optional. Sexual preference will be privatized, unless otherwise suspected by bloggers, paparazzi, etc., in which case, you assume full responsibility of damage control. Apply at your own risk...


Now that 50's been counted out of the runnings, for the most part, Hip Hop is a need of a new nigga we love to hate. Or, hate to love, depending on your vantage point. A bad guy. Thanks to Rick Ross, Clipse, Raekwon, Killa Cam, Ghostface, and a handful of other hot spitters, 2009 saw the reemergence of Cocaine rap, with a vengeance. Well, if you count the brief 'Trap Rap' phenom, it never went anywhere, but I'm just saying. Even still, there's a galaxy's difference between a hustler and a gangster. Granted, the two can occupy the same space simultaneously, but ultimately you're one or the other. Where as hustler's talk slick and attempt to keep their noses clean-no pun intended, gangster's talk loud, and have dirty nails. Which brings us back to the role of the bad guy, a part 50 played so well that by the end of his stint with Interscope, he'd taken shots at both Dr. Dre and Jimmy Iovine. Gotta love it.


Who can we look to now, for extreme nigganometry and self righteous egotism, in between making the hoes dance and niggas wanna clap something? Who's voice is strong enough to fill the shoes? This is a necessary balance needed, lest we allow Drake and Kanye West to be in charge of the dispersement of aggression in rap music. No dice. So far the emo-rap community's street cred includes slapping Canadians, slapping paparazzi cameras, & getting slapped by abortion-having, scorned ex-girlfriends. Kid Cudi did get pulled over by the LAPD, but in his defense, cops in my city are so dumb they still haven't caught the dude(s) who killed Christopher Wallace. They sure as fuck caught O.J. pretty quick though, but I digress. Plus, the only person who can wear tight pants & be a bad motherfucker, simultaneously, is dead. Long live Rick James. Plenty of dudes on the rap radar have the ability to deliver grimy stories and gritty tales of street life, but that doesn't necessarily qualify them to be in charge of an entire sub-genre of a culture.


In the movie 'Matrix', how many of you can say that, not only were you rooting for Agent Smith, but you were extra hyped when he returned in the sequel, with upgrades? I knew that the future of the free world was dependent of Neo's victory, but in the interim, I needed to see him get his ass kicked by the bad guy. If it was just Neo flying around & having copious amounts of sex with that chick that looked like a little boy, that movie would've sucked. How important was Superman without Lex Luthor? Scores of bad guys could cross Clark's path, but Lex was the yang to his yin. Really though, cats had equal the amount of super abilities, sometimes even more so, & this little bald headed Jewish guy could eff up Superman's day faster than he could wax his dome piece. Now, rap needs a new yin, or something to that effect, to give us the overstanding of the underview, to balance all the emotional rollercoasters that we're bombarded with on a daily basis.


Without a bad guy, there's just "the good guy," & that's no fun at all.


Otherwise, rest assured, in no less than 5 years, Hip Hop will look like 'Revenge of the Nerds'-the musical. Will we be following Booger, or Ogre?