Here's why.........
Because he's a good president.
He's very humble, articulate, well-mannered, intelligent, efficient, stern; just an all around stand-up guy. & so far, his performance as Commander-In-Chief has been pretty fair if not pretty good. That, not does a great president make.
A "great" president has a landmark. Meaning, he has some oafish, retard quality that pinpoints his idiocy within a matter of seconds, & solidifies his legacy for time indefinite. Bush (1 & 2) both had that brain-numbing ability to pause mid-sentence, like bullets in 'The Matrix' movie, then drop the hammer in a manner that leaves something to be desired. Like a purpose for your time. & any president with the ability to make up & fully utilize non-words, such as "nucular", wins hands down over a man, such as Obama, who can actually prove his point using his grasp of the English language. Sorry Barry, you lose.
Landmarks can be overridden by charisma. Especially the charisma of a pimp/child molester as we found in Big Willy Clinton. Even before he let interns sample the southern-style life juices, he still had that "don't leave him alone with you're most attractive daughter, no matter her age" air about him. But, when he made the Oval office his personal mini-gentlemen's club, along with the help of Monica Lewinsky's mouth, he proved what we all thought. Bill was a stud; a himbo of sorts. The type of guy to install a stripper pole in his bedroom. The type of guy who really did buy edible undies; most likely for himself. The type of guy who'd ditch Secret Service during an early morning jog just to scarf down a grease-slathered McRib sandwich. With or without his saxophone with him. He did great things for world relations, but greater things for playas across the globe. As for B.O. (no disrespect, sir), you have a wonderful, supportive family. So, again, score one for the other guy.
Our current president is the antithesis of most his predecessors. The closest to a joke about him is the fact that he has those lips; too close to the roach clip lips. With 3/4 of the population being admitted weedaholics, who really cares. Let's face it, there's not much to do in Hawaii but surf (he is half-white), crack cocnuts open with rocks (hey, close enough to bananas, right?), & get zooted. Something tells me basketball sort of fell in his lap, being the only black guy on an island & all.
Maybe he'll accidentally back over his dog, or sprain his ankle going in for a lay up. Oh how the media would eat up our first Black C.I.C twisting his ankle playing the one sport we totally dominate. That would probably be just as bad as paparazzi snapping shots of Michelle Obama hording Kool Aid at the local Food For Less. Even that wouldn't be so depressingly humorous as Watergate &/or releasing tens of thousands of crazed people back into society for lack of funding. Yeah, Reagan's innate douchebagology was that of the rich man who steps over the one homeless guy who really does need twenty five cents for a cup of hot chocolate. Good luck with that winter chill, average joe.
Being the nice guy that he's unable to stop being, you've got to wonder about the presidents who actually were great, in the literal sense of the term. For example, Lincoln. An avid believer in freedom for all; brains blown out at the theatre. Kennedy Jr; an avid believer in freedom for all; brains blown out while the whole world watched. If there's any correlation, I'll let you make it. But I will say that being a Humanitarian sure isn't what it seems to be.
I guess one could assess that Obama's greatness is/will be pidgeonholed by the fact that he's [half] black; the first of his kind. Perhaps in the history books, hundreds of years down the line, he'll be known as the man who opened up the White House to Asians, women, homosexuals, midgets, hispanics, you name it. With his inaugruation, the melting pot finally spilled over onto the lily white steps of Washington D.C. That in itself has got to be a set up for some type of joke, & a great one at that.
Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts
Monday, April 20, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Us(a) VS. Them
Call me old-fashioned, but I understand the plight of the "pirates".
I'm not sure where their exact home base is located, but I know they're not American. If they were, they wouldn't waste time negotiating ransoms & collecting hostages. That's not the American way. They'd jump aboard the ship, kill everyone on board, rape, pillage, plunder & leave with whatever wasn't bolted down.
Yep, that sounds about right.
Most likely, when they were done domesticating the captured vessel, they'd tow it back to shore & convert it to a cruise ship, gambling boat or some other money-driven endeavor designed to further fund the one-sided war being waged on the remainder of humanity. You know, everybody who wasn't/isn't American.
Instead, said "pirates" are an obvious band of vigilante refugees apparently fed-up with westernized thinking & conductivity (i.e. "Fuck you; this is rightfully ours no matter what you think & we dare you to do something about it!"). Westernized thinking that has left them a defeated, forgotten people. Lawless & desperate, it would appear that their abandonment issues have gotten the best of them; a prime example of the chickens coming home to roost.
Funny thing about oppression is that it's not savvy at all. Therefore, it's backlash is equally as, if not more so, treacherous. Europe was the main target in the seek & seizure exercises of the Somalians, but we had to expect that at some point the melee would spill over onto it's brother. Us(a). Whether or not we (America) played in active role in the proverbial destruction of their continent is unproven per se, but there's no convincing a man with a gun aimed at your head. You either hope God is as good as you thought or fight back. So, fight back it is.
President Obama (& every president before him) publicly stated that we don't negotiate with terrorists. We let the business end of a bullet do all the necessary talking. I'm on the fence about that, partly because I am American & love my country, & partly because the movie Amistad was about my people & I rooted for the slaves when they took over the ship.
So, who do I root for here? Had one of my relatives been aboard that Maersk cargo transporter when it was taken over, I could easily cheer for the red, white & blue. But they weren't. Not only do I love an underdog, but I love a rebel with a cause even more. I grew up listening to Chuck D telling me to "fight the power". Little did I knew at age 12 that the "power" I'd be fighting was the same power with unmitigated control over my life. & just think, the Somalians probably despise Pres. Obama even more than most Kenyans. They are waiting to attack his credibility on both continents.
For whatever reason, they didn't kill the captain. I think it was because deep down inside there's still a fear of white skin that predates any current social conflict. Had the captain been an American of African Descent, I don't think the Navy S.E.A.L.'s would have had the same opportunity at murder. Or justice, as we like to call it.
Hopefully, there will come a day when the world can get on the same page & put the word "mankind" to good use. We're still stuck on the "kind of man", so I don't see any change in the near future. Until that utopia is ascertained, expect things to worsen extensively.
I seriously doubt the next captain caught slipping will be so lucky.
I'm not sure where their exact home base is located, but I know they're not American. If they were, they wouldn't waste time negotiating ransoms & collecting hostages. That's not the American way. They'd jump aboard the ship, kill everyone on board, rape, pillage, plunder & leave with whatever wasn't bolted down.
Yep, that sounds about right.
Most likely, when they were done domesticating the captured vessel, they'd tow it back to shore & convert it to a cruise ship, gambling boat or some other money-driven endeavor designed to further fund the one-sided war being waged on the remainder of humanity. You know, everybody who wasn't/isn't American.
Instead, said "pirates" are an obvious band of vigilante refugees apparently fed-up with westernized thinking & conductivity (i.e. "Fuck you; this is rightfully ours no matter what you think & we dare you to do something about it!"). Westernized thinking that has left them a defeated, forgotten people. Lawless & desperate, it would appear that their abandonment issues have gotten the best of them; a prime example of the chickens coming home to roost.
Funny thing about oppression is that it's not savvy at all. Therefore, it's backlash is equally as, if not more so, treacherous. Europe was the main target in the seek & seizure exercises of the Somalians, but we had to expect that at some point the melee would spill over onto it's brother. Us(a). Whether or not we (America) played in active role in the proverbial destruction of their continent is unproven per se, but there's no convincing a man with a gun aimed at your head. You either hope God is as good as you thought or fight back. So, fight back it is.
President Obama (& every president before him) publicly stated that we don't negotiate with terrorists. We let the business end of a bullet do all the necessary talking. I'm on the fence about that, partly because I am American & love my country, & partly because the movie Amistad was about my people & I rooted for the slaves when they took over the ship.
So, who do I root for here? Had one of my relatives been aboard that Maersk cargo transporter when it was taken over, I could easily cheer for the red, white & blue. But they weren't. Not only do I love an underdog, but I love a rebel with a cause even more. I grew up listening to Chuck D telling me to "fight the power". Little did I knew at age 12 that the "power" I'd be fighting was the same power with unmitigated control over my life. & just think, the Somalians probably despise Pres. Obama even more than most Kenyans. They are waiting to attack his credibility on both continents.
For whatever reason, they didn't kill the captain. I think it was because deep down inside there's still a fear of white skin that predates any current social conflict. Had the captain been an American of African Descent, I don't think the Navy S.E.A.L.'s would have had the same opportunity at murder. Or justice, as we like to call it.
Hopefully, there will come a day when the world can get on the same page & put the word "mankind" to good use. We're still stuck on the "kind of man", so I don't see any change in the near future. Until that utopia is ascertained, expect things to worsen extensively.
I seriously doubt the next captain caught slipping will be so lucky.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Black President
*thunderous applause*
Barak Hussein Obama has done it! After decades of speeches, rallies, movements, & tremendous bloodshed, the dream has finally been realized.
Just look around at all the commemorative plates, collectible coins, swap meet T-shirts & "GObama!" bobbleheads flooding our street corners. I just copped me some Obama shoelaces & a "BaRak Yo' Block!" key chain. Can't beat 2 for 5. Congratulations are in order & well deserved.
*cue "Hail to the Chief"*
In America's eyes, a black man is now Commander-in-Chief. But to black folks, we know black men to be, well, a lot different than our President is. Could you imagine...
*DJ scratching "If I ruled the world" by NaS feat. Lauryn Hill*
Upon announcing his acceptance of the nomination, the speakers would begin blaring "My President is Black", complete with a surprise performance from Young Jeezy, draped in a red, white & blue ankle length chinchilla fur coat, throwing bottles of Belvedere vodka into the audience. The soon to be president-elect throwing up his W's (for Washington, no doubt) in the background. As he & Jeezy exit the platform, he quickly swings back around, & shouts "y'heard?!?" into the mic before chucking the deuce.
The secret service/hype men are uniformed in XXLarge white tees, complete with starched sleeve creases & all white Air Force 1's (of course) to match. Cornrows optional, stunna shades mandatory.
There's a few fist fights in the 3 mil plus crowd, the faint stench of purple kush wafting through the air, combining with all the Cool Water & Drakkar fumes you would expect from so many black folks in one location. As the cavalry of triple-black armored Benz trucks roll out, it would be easy to spot the soon-to-be president's vehicle, because his license plate would read "SALLGUD". 26" chrome rims sparkle as they swerve towards destiny.
Inauguration Day would historically be moved to Los Angeles, held at the Staple Center, on a Sunday morning. On this day, every Baptist church in South Cali is empty. Now, imagine the tailgate party when Clarke plays Grambling. Then multiply that by 10,000. You could smell the barbecue ribs from Inglewood, all the way to Pico Rivera.
Hangover in full swing, Mr. President makes his way to the podium. Removing a pair of Gucci shades (the ones with the huge gold insignia on the side), he glances red-eyed over the sea of people, & then bellows a tremendously loud "Hellllllllllll Yeeeeeeeyaaaaaaaah". The crowd goes wild, a couple of gunshots ring out in the distance, which cause the secret service to discard their barbecue filled paper plates & pick up their unregistered fire arms. But all remains peaceful, that's just how we celebrate.
After a very brief speech that starts with "Yo!" & finishes with "Nah'mean?!", he steps back, opens his suit jacket to reveal body armor & screams, "Weeee maaaaaaaade iiiiiiiit! Fo' mo' yeahs! Fo' mo' yeahs!", as animated onlookers join in with the chant. Jesse Jackson appears from nowhere to join the on stage festivities, but is beaten severely about the head & shoulders, & dragged off the stage kicking & screaming. Secret service quickly return to their chicken, ribs & cans of grape soda. The crowd explodes with excitement, & the one white guy who had the balls to come & support the cause is robbed at gunpoint amongst a sea of wave caps, braids & the occasional Jheri Curl.
The President is then joined by all three of his baby mommas, along with three younger ladies (his daughters Sh'Terra, Monifa & Gwendanae, who's pushing a baby stroller) & two young men (his sons DaLonte & Martelle) dressed just like the secret service, but in platinum chains with rotating, diamond covered medallions of Martin Luther King Jr. & Rosa Parks' faces.
The first family, indeed.
*cue "Hail to the Chief"*
Meanwhile, somewhere in the trenches, various KKK groups are madder than hell, but even more scared to leave their log cabins. The smart ones have stocked up on enough bologna, chewing tobacco & whiskey to last the entire 4 year term.
Sean "P. Diddy" Combs remixes The National Anthem, & Newport cigarettes experiences their largest profit margin ever.
God Bless America, Fa Sho!
Barak Hussein Obama has done it! After decades of speeches, rallies, movements, & tremendous bloodshed, the dream has finally been realized.
Just look around at all the commemorative plates, collectible coins, swap meet T-shirts & "GObama!" bobbleheads flooding our street corners. I just copped me some Obama shoelaces & a "BaRak Yo' Block!" key chain. Can't beat 2 for 5. Congratulations are in order & well deserved.
*cue "Hail to the Chief"*
In America's eyes, a black man is now Commander-in-Chief. But to black folks, we know black men to be, well, a lot different than our President is. Could you imagine...
*DJ scratching "If I ruled the world" by NaS feat. Lauryn Hill*
Upon announcing his acceptance of the nomination, the speakers would begin blaring "My President is Black", complete with a surprise performance from Young Jeezy, draped in a red, white & blue ankle length chinchilla fur coat, throwing bottles of Belvedere vodka into the audience. The soon to be president-elect throwing up his W's (for Washington, no doubt) in the background. As he & Jeezy exit the platform, he quickly swings back around, & shouts "y'heard?!?" into the mic before chucking the deuce.
The secret service/hype men are uniformed in XXLarge white tees, complete with starched sleeve creases & all white Air Force 1's (of course) to match. Cornrows optional, stunna shades mandatory.
There's a few fist fights in the 3 mil plus crowd, the faint stench of purple kush wafting through the air, combining with all the Cool Water & Drakkar fumes you would expect from so many black folks in one location. As the cavalry of triple-black armored Benz trucks roll out, it would be easy to spot the soon-to-be president's vehicle, because his license plate would read "SALLGUD". 26" chrome rims sparkle as they swerve towards destiny.
Inauguration Day would historically be moved to Los Angeles, held at the Staple Center, on a Sunday morning. On this day, every Baptist church in South Cali is empty. Now, imagine the tailgate party when Clarke plays Grambling. Then multiply that by 10,000. You could smell the barbecue ribs from Inglewood, all the way to Pico Rivera.
Hangover in full swing, Mr. President makes his way to the podium. Removing a pair of Gucci shades (the ones with the huge gold insignia on the side), he glances red-eyed over the sea of people, & then bellows a tremendously loud "Hellllllllllll Yeeeeeeeyaaaaaaaah". The crowd goes wild, a couple of gunshots ring out in the distance, which cause the secret service to discard their barbecue filled paper plates & pick up their unregistered fire arms. But all remains peaceful, that's just how we celebrate.
After a very brief speech that starts with "Yo!" & finishes with "Nah'mean?!", he steps back, opens his suit jacket to reveal body armor & screams, "Weeee maaaaaaaade iiiiiiiit! Fo' mo' yeahs! Fo' mo' yeahs!", as animated onlookers join in with the chant. Jesse Jackson appears from nowhere to join the on stage festivities, but is beaten severely about the head & shoulders, & dragged off the stage kicking & screaming. Secret service quickly return to their chicken, ribs & cans of grape soda. The crowd explodes with excitement, & the one white guy who had the balls to come & support the cause is robbed at gunpoint amongst a sea of wave caps, braids & the occasional Jheri Curl.
The President is then joined by all three of his baby mommas, along with three younger ladies (his daughters Sh'Terra, Monifa & Gwendanae, who's pushing a baby stroller) & two young men (his sons DaLonte & Martelle) dressed just like the secret service, but in platinum chains with rotating, diamond covered medallions of Martin Luther King Jr. & Rosa Parks' faces.
The first family, indeed.
*cue "Hail to the Chief"*
Meanwhile, somewhere in the trenches, various KKK groups are madder than hell, but even more scared to leave their log cabins. The smart ones have stocked up on enough bologna, chewing tobacco & whiskey to last the entire 4 year term.
Sean "P. Diddy" Combs remixes The National Anthem, & Newport cigarettes experiences their largest profit margin ever.
God Bless America, Fa Sho!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Say It Loud
Friends, Romans, Countrymen. & Drug Addicts, Prostitutes, Congressmen, School Teachers, Truck Drivers, etc. Lend me your ears (& a couple bucks if you got it, the economy's hurtin' my pockets something awful).......
Rejoice in new found freedom & respect! The long sought after spoils of trial & tribulation! The triumphant calm after what has been a tumultuous storm! Altogether now, say it loud;
I'm Black (African American, I mean) & I'm proud!
If only Malcolm, Martin, & Abraham Lincoln were here to see this.
Finally, Black folk can hold our heads high for somethin' other than the sake of lookin' cool, or exhalin' the smoke of choice skyward. It took time, but we moved from the back of the bus, to the backyard of the White House.
Barbeque's will never be the same again.
Even the least self-righteous house coon must feel a small swell in his chest right now. Not since the National Security backlash of 9/11 have so many Americans of African descent happily exclaimed "Damn, I'm glad I'm black".
*Get it, because that's when all the heat was shifted to those who looked like terr-nevermind.*
It's a proud day in human history when the most profoundly biased nation on the planet has allowed (yes, allowed. Dr. MLK Jr. didn't get killed THAT long ago, folks) a man of other than caucasion nationality to helm this country's voyage. Kudos, President Obama. It even sounds cool, doesn't it?
Hopefully, this ginormous leap in politics will do what Soulja Boy couldn't achieve with "Crank That". What Snoop Dogg couldn't do with "Gin & Juice", & what John Singleton couldn't accomplish with "Baby Boy" or "Poetic Justice".
Unite Black people (most, if not all) coast to coast.
It might not be the rags to riches story that rap careers are made of (county checks, the projects, blah blah blah, although his Dad did bounce on him), but its one of success regardless. Inauguration Day marks the reaching of the fabled Promised Land, or at least a viable step closer to the property line. & I'll tell you what, the fact that Barak is only 50% black doesn't sour the deal one bit. We can even go so far as to give White folks a little credit as well, because half of him is theirs anyway. That seems more than fair. Not "40 acres & a mule" fair, but fair nonetheless.
With all this partyin' like it's 1999, I feel obligated to briefly play devils advocate. Not to long ago, in a not so far away place, when there was a mess to clean up, no matter the magnitude, that job almost always went to the help (read: black people). Anybody see the news today? Or yesterday? Any day within the last year or so? Did I hear the word "conspiracy"? Guess it just my imagination. Or maybe not.........
So, before everything gets worse (& let's be real here, "better" isn't even a blip on the radar yet), let us enjoy our moment in the books. Barak Obama achieved superhero status, leaping insurmountable odds in a single election. If planet Earth wants to put a face to the black (I mean African American) experience, I'd rather it be an eloquette, college educated, family oriented man of color, as opposed to, say, someone such as 50 cent.
"Go Shawty, it's ya berfday" can only get us so far ahead as a people, nahmean?
The past has already passed, the present is presenting itself to us at this very moment, but for the first time since the introduction of the iPod, the future is somewhat bright & hopeful.
I, for one, am rather excited, & definitely inspired. Now, I'm going to jump in my ride, play "Hail to the Chief" at the highest volume, & go get "Obama Nation" tattooed on my neck for the whole world to see.
Happy Birthday, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
*go go go go go go go go shawty, its ya berfday*
Rejoice in new found freedom & respect! The long sought after spoils of trial & tribulation! The triumphant calm after what has been a tumultuous storm! Altogether now, say it loud;
I'm Black (African American, I mean) & I'm proud!
If only Malcolm, Martin, & Abraham Lincoln were here to see this.
Finally, Black folk can hold our heads high for somethin' other than the sake of lookin' cool, or exhalin' the smoke of choice skyward. It took time, but we moved from the back of the bus, to the backyard of the White House.
Barbeque's will never be the same again.
Even the least self-righteous house coon must feel a small swell in his chest right now. Not since the National Security backlash of 9/11 have so many Americans of African descent happily exclaimed "Damn, I'm glad I'm black".
*Get it, because that's when all the heat was shifted to those who looked like terr-nevermind.*
It's a proud day in human history when the most profoundly biased nation on the planet has allowed (yes, allowed. Dr. MLK Jr. didn't get killed THAT long ago, folks) a man of other than caucasion nationality to helm this country's voyage. Kudos, President Obama. It even sounds cool, doesn't it?
Hopefully, this ginormous leap in politics will do what Soulja Boy couldn't achieve with "Crank That". What Snoop Dogg couldn't do with "Gin & Juice", & what John Singleton couldn't accomplish with "Baby Boy" or "Poetic Justice".
Unite Black people (most, if not all) coast to coast.
It might not be the rags to riches story that rap careers are made of (county checks, the projects, blah blah blah, although his Dad did bounce on him), but its one of success regardless. Inauguration Day marks the reaching of the fabled Promised Land, or at least a viable step closer to the property line. & I'll tell you what, the fact that Barak is only 50% black doesn't sour the deal one bit. We can even go so far as to give White folks a little credit as well, because half of him is theirs anyway. That seems more than fair. Not "40 acres & a mule" fair, but fair nonetheless.
With all this partyin' like it's 1999, I feel obligated to briefly play devils advocate. Not to long ago, in a not so far away place, when there was a mess to clean up, no matter the magnitude, that job almost always went to the help (read: black people). Anybody see the news today? Or yesterday? Any day within the last year or so? Did I hear the word "conspiracy"? Guess it just my imagination. Or maybe not.........
So, before everything gets worse (& let's be real here, "better" isn't even a blip on the radar yet), let us enjoy our moment in the books. Barak Obama achieved superhero status, leaping insurmountable odds in a single election. If planet Earth wants to put a face to the black (I mean African American) experience, I'd rather it be an eloquette, college educated, family oriented man of color, as opposed to, say, someone such as 50 cent.
"Go Shawty, it's ya berfday" can only get us so far ahead as a people, nahmean?
The past has already passed, the present is presenting itself to us at this very moment, but for the first time since the introduction of the iPod, the future is somewhat bright & hopeful.
I, for one, am rather excited, & definitely inspired. Now, I'm going to jump in my ride, play "Hail to the Chief" at the highest volume, & go get "Obama Nation" tattooed on my neck for the whole world to see.
Happy Birthday, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
*go go go go go go go go shawty, its ya berfday*
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