Hate The Game, Not The Player...

So, Lamar Odom married Khloe Kardashian, girlfriend of about 3 months, over the weekend. Thus, leaving behind his baby momma &/or love interest of about 10 years & their 2 children. According to TMZ.com, Liza Morales is dealing with Odom's marriage for her kids & wishes the newlywed's happiness because "everyone deserves to be happy". However, she refused to let THEIR children attend their FATHER'S wedding. WTF?!

Says Ms. Morales-"Yes, the circumstances over the last few weeks have been upsetting but none of my actions publicly or from the privacy of my home could be classified as a meltdown. I have maintained a brave face for my children who are my main concern and I remain strong for them."

Maybe I missed something in my slow, neanderthal way of man-thinking, but did somebody die? Sounds like the worst thing ever has happened to her & life is at a complete stand still. Really though, 10 years & no wedding? You've been living fantasies sweetie, for 'bout a decade or so. No Shots, though...

Swizz Beats, musical mastermind behind a whole bunch of shit, has apparently left his wife, R&B singer Mashonda for a more popular, & arguably more talented (& more attractive. No Shots, though) Alicia Keys. This isn't new news by any stretch of the public eye's imagination. Though the couple is still legally married, Swizz has more than made it official that his marriage is doomed to despair & has since had his pieces picked up by Ms. Keys, soon to be Mrs. Beatz, figuratively & literally speaking. Now, Mashonda has made her outcry public document via Twitter (is there any other way to snitch??).

Says Mashonda-"Already I can hear some of you saying "why are u blaming her, You cant make someone leave their wife, You cant break something thats broken". Well, my marriage was not broken, as far as I knew we were celebrating our sons birth and getting ready to celebrate our 5 year wedding anniversary . Call it blind love, whatever. I call it being a devoted wife.."

"As far as I knew" is usually what a defendant says on the stand when asked about their knowledge of some criminal act that's taken place, when they know damn well it wasn't right. Or, what most women say to illustrate the blind eye they've decided to turn towards whatever mishap has landed in their weaves semi-unexpectedly.

Regardless to the urban legends & broken home myths that fill court building hallways, children don't fix marriages/relationships, & hold no bearings over an individual's happiness. Truth be told, the children are often the resulting mistakes of people acting like the animals they are. Rarely are children born as a sum of love + happiness. I would go in on women not recognizing the power of the 'tang & just handing it to any guy without a speech impediment, but what do I know?

Actually, quite a bit...

Women, you need to understand the nature of the beast with which you decide to up the vajayjay to. Men are merely boys with body hair & bad credit scores, give or take. Man's intention lies in self-serving gratification, be it physical or otherwise. We like things that make us happy, per se. Fun things. Things that aren't hard to operate or take a lot of concentration to engage in. Men complicate things solely out of frustration, where as women seem to do it out of necessity. That alone is an oil & water situation, from the first date (booty call) to the last kiss (booty call). It's not that all men are dogs, or that we're selfish beings from the planet Stingy. It's just that once something stops being fun, we don't like it anymore. Ladies, how many XBox360 games does your man own? Do you know why? Because he finished a game, & at that point, he needed something new to have fun with. It wasn't anything personal towards the game itself; nothing to do with if it gained weight or let itself go. He's simple finished, bored & has moved on from that game, now dull & mundane. Now, had the game learned some new levels or created some alternate endings every time he got to the end, that would be a different scenario altogether.

I'm no Steve Harvey, but women, certain things can't be done in the traditional sense if you want to keep a man. Let's start with the word "keep". You "keep" a pet. You "keep" a pair of shoes. You don't "keep" a man; you "keep" him happy. If you're willing to get willy-nilly over the fact that he's moved on, then get equally as willy-nilly in your efforts to keep him around beforehand.

It's actually not that hard. In fact, most women could/would lighten their load if they just check dude out thoroughly before he becomes an amusement park's worth of genitals. I've always said to my home girls, as far back as I can remember, "Don't bone that dude. Yet.". No hate fellas, but we all know we've told that to a close home girl, only to be ignored while she "falls in love", then soon after has a bastard child while dude has already driven away to the next sperm receptacle. If you've ever seen a Tyler Perry movie, you have an idea how that system operates.

It's always amazed me that the behavior of Man is common knowledge, yet every woman thinks her cooch is the Kryptonite to every super guy she sleeps with. No Dice. Cats wear lead draws these days, girls. In case you're not hip to Superman-ese, that means that dude's already prepared for whatever new entrapment weaponry you think you've invented. It takes more than a home-cooked meal & D.S.L.'s to make a dude want to hang up is walking, umm, running shoes.

Not to be mean, but sometimes that willingness to churn out rug rats without a genuine, God-fearing commitment can come back to bite you in that same booty of yours that answers everytime he calls (see what I did there?). Whatever it is that you assume is so pleasing to him, keep this in mind; there's always a less attractive, less demanding, more appreciative woman out there, so you really need to give him ample reason to stick around for the arguments & what not. Really though. Separation from the pack is far more arduous than separation of the legs.

By no means are these shots at the ladies. In fact, I hope this helps some young, unexpecting girl to realize that a happy, healthy relationship is as easy to attain as an unwanted pregnancy or an STD, if you understand what I'm getting at. Women seem to have a tendency to look down the road, love-wise, & neglect the present. Too busy looking for the marriage, without giving the courtship the proper attention. Then, when it all falls down, the man's a dog, a womanizer, a Federline, etc.

If it takes 2 to tango, then why on Earth wouldn't it take 2 to fuck up a relationship? Most cats naturally have an exit strategy embedded in their psyche to begin with. It's just about how, when, &/or where is it going to take place? Knowing how to diffuse said mechanism is the mark of a woman worth being "kept" by.

Word.

I heart U

I know we've been on Michael Jackson overdose (npi) for about a week now. I refuse to add to that with some "tribute" or give you a reiteration of what the entire planet's been talking about.

What I will do is use the situation as a wake up call for Love. We, as humans, have this unconscious desire to love, & the ability to carry it out into action. Some say that's what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom. That, & the fact that we worship God. I believe other animals can love, but its more "that's the hand that feeds me" ethos, rather than "I'll die for him by choice".

Either way, I'm not an advocate for animal rights, so in most cases I couldn't care less what happens to them. Don't worry, I don't have any pets. I have kids, I don't need other helpless creatures to poop on my furniture, eat my food & do whatever it takes to garner my attention. & for the record, I don't even like most Humans that much.

But the ones I do care about, its undoubtedly love. I'm old enough to have filtered out the unnecessary buffoons from my life. & most people considered "friends" are just useless seat fillers in the theater of the mind. No Dice. They can get popcorn somewhere else. So, the remainder are part of my extended family, some blood related, most aren't. I don't need similar blood plasma or a DNA test for one to be considered family.

F*@k a Maury Povich.

I said that to say this; appreciate your loved ones while they're here. An old person said to me once, "give flowers to the living". I took that to mean that dead people don't say thank you, much less realize what the hell is going on. They're dead, remember? For some reason, people thought MJ was invincible (again, npi), & we never expected such a thing to happen to him. But it did, & it will happen again countlessly until the last days.

Life is a one-time deal, & within an eye's blink, it can change forever. Take no one for granted. Let those whom you care for know that, as often as you wish. &, on the same token, don't waste time on folks who aren't worth yours.

There's not much worse than a 6 year relationship wasted on some douche who can't give you a refund on time. Actually, what's worse is having an intregal part of your life taken from existence without warning, & living the rest of your life angry because the last time you talked to them was an argument, & you never had the chance to say "I love you", much less say goodbye.

Think about it. God bless. Hey, I love y'all.

"The Last Dragon"

I love my wife.

Although it took some time, quite a bit of growth (on my part of course), & a sprinkle of Divine intervention (okay, more like a drenching downpour), I realize now that in order to digest the harsh realities of a cruel world, it's imperative that I have a strong, black (African American I mean..) woman standing next to me. Not biased, just personal preference.

Next to me, as opposed to behind, unless I'm protectin' her from things that go bump in the night, terrorists, or jumping spiders. Plus, God made Eve from a rib, a supportive structure bone from Adam's side. He could've used a vertebrae, but He opted otherwise.

If I were easily influenced, rap music, bitter friends, & endless hours of watching "The Maury Povich Show" would have me under the impression that "love" is just a myth. Especially Black love. Contagious urban legend that's been recounted to generations throughout the ages. Unattainable to mortal man. None of which is remotely close to actuality.

Don't let the national divorce rate fool you. They're just propaganda.

Love is equally as tangible & powerful as hate, as the two undoubtedly intersect at some point. Sort of like third cousins. If you continue tracing the bloodlines, you'll find the connection eventually.

It's most powerful enemy is Lust, the device to which our primal insticts are attuned to. Lust knows no sense of humor, nor does it recognize the "good" in people. It only knows animalistic behavior & mating rituals. Not particularly the foundation one should lay (no pun intended) for a long term partnership.

& while Lust can indeed induce profuse sweatin', elevated heart rates & heavy breathin', Love is in reality the more laboring of the pair. Lust is a job, Love is a career, if you understand the difference between the two.

Take the movie "The Last Dragon" for example. Bruce Leroy had to tolerate endless hardship, which he willingly traversed, because he realized the spoils of his fleeting reward would be worth the travel. That's dedication. All the tumult he endured made the moment he had been searchin' for that much more gratifying (the "glow", remember?). & when he kicked Sho-Nuff's ass in that warehouse, you couldn't tell him nothin'! Word to Kanye West.

In a nutshell, that's love. A fight with yourself (control), for your self (satisfaction). Many never find it, but c'mon, when have you ever located an object having no idea what it looked like?

"Yo, can you help me find my keys, man?"

"What do they look like?"

Good question.

If that epiphany could be experienced in our teenage years, how sweet would life be? Granted, more than half of us (me included) wouldn't have some of the beautiful children we were blessed with, but that aspect is surely debatable. Others wouldn't have some of the horrible diseases we were cursed with (DEFINITELY NOT me included, thank God), but like my Dad says, "hindsight is 20/20". It would make for a much more comfortable commute to the end of our respective roads.

I'm teachin' my kids this crap ahead of time. I advise you do the same.

In digression, I love my wife. No major follow up statement or witty, tongue-in-cheek quip, I just like saying it aloud.