Lil Wayne is headed to the slammer in less than a week. I know, shocker right? Not so coincidentally, he'll miss at least 3-4 of his children's birthday's while on vacation. See, I know a lot of irresponsible cats, but I can honestly say that I don't know any who have several kids who'll all turn the same age in the same year. I figured by now, he would have done an interview, or YouTube video explaining how latex gives him hives, or he's allergic to birth control pill residue, & how "kids" should practice safe sex, even if he doesn't. Hell, he could even throw a "Say Nope To Dope" in there as a sort of private joke. No dice. He just shucks & jives as usual, taking publicity photos with whatever random offspring is visiting him on the tour bus that weekend. Not to sound like a douche nozzle, but a rich, drug addicted father is the stuff that poor kids have wet dreams about. Lucky little dust bunnies. &, as if a gaggle of baby mommas isn't complicated enough, the reasons behind his legal woes (legal woes being the reason he'll miss back-to-back-to-back-to-back parties), are in short, unnecessary. Drugs & guns. Two things that folks with money should never have to worry about carrying. Yet & still, here he is, with a cabbage patch full of garbage pail kids, rivaled only by the life giving 'tang of Erykah Badu, & time behind bars an inevitable reality. Undoubtedly, this man has an Unnecessary Complication Complex. A classic case, if I ever saw one.
Now, should we be surprised that Kanye West has been absent from the past few major publicity events that have been rammed down our collective esophagi?
No.
See, the "average" celebrity would've taken that opportunity to throw a jab at the then-president at face value. Even though the world had a pretty good idea that George Bush couldn't care less about the coloreds, Yeezy spoke for us, with balls the size of monkey fists. [ll]. Maybe we didn't thank him loud enough. It's hard to be heard over a personality the size of San Francisco. You know, there was actually a time in American history where such a remark by a person of the negronious persuasion would've been viewed as mutiny, & he would've been lynched for TWO reasons, instead of the usual one. Ha. But, he got away with it, & continued to Hippity Hop along about his pink, fuzz-covered business. But, along that path, he found several more missteps to make, most of which involved him looking like a slick-talking cock sucker, at the expense of poor, defenseless White people. While rappers are beefing with other unimportant Blacks, Kanye waged war with Taylor Swift, wanna-be photographers, & PETA. For the record, PETA is like the NRA, with fur & paws, instead of rifles & rednecks. Unnecessary remark, after unnecessary remark, each one only complicating the last, making a future redemption song that much harder to write, much less sing. Now, at the Grammy Awards, not only does security have orders that he's a domestic terrorist, but as added insult to an already injured ego, he actually won. Twice, I think. That's like a chick handcuffing you to a radiator, across the room, then having her way with her lady parts, while you watch, leaving you to stew in your helplessness. I've heard that the path of a genius is rife with insanity. In that case, I now understand why Kanye does the crazy shit he does. I also read that Albert Einstein talked to, & answered himself, & was unable to tie his own shoes. So, yeah.
Point is, celebrities are normal people, who happen to be famous for whatever parlor trick they've perfected. & like us "normal" folk, they have the innate ability to pile bullshit upon their shoulders until they topple over into their own hysteria. Trouble is, they're really not "normal" people at all. By the time they've reached such a lucrative apex in life, all the individuals who wouldn't mind getting dirty to keep them clean have been replaced by "Yes!" men, hob knobblers & douche bag leeches who've been praying for that day like Albino's pray for shady places. No shots. If a plain, simple, average, basic man impregnates countless women, & gets caught up for drugs & weapons, it's no big deal. I doubt that his life is headed in a direction where such set-backs will actually hinder his life's work. But, if said man is worth a million bucks, with an undoubtedly bright future ahead of him, those same unwise choices could spell uncertainty, doom, & possible failure. Unnecessary complication, indeed. Same goes with well intended, however misguided outbursts at no one in particular. The homeless guy, on the corner, spouting about how the king needs to be overthrown, in between begging for loose change & throwing rocks at passing vehicles is virtually harmless. To himself & anyone in the vicinity. But, if that man is a brand, a company unto himself, with the world at his proverbial fingertips, said man goes from "crazy dude", to "dumb motherfucker", if you smell my cologne.
One of the perks of being "normal", or a nobody like most of us, is that our mistakes & up-fucks won't have that much of an effect on our lives, however meaningless & disposable. But, once you have things to gain, you also have things to lose, & the last thing you'd want in that situation is a UCC. Unnecessary Complication Complex.
Life is easy. It's the decision-making process that's difficult.
Maybe I'll start an online self-help website for these dingleberry famous people who habitual shit where they sleep. I can charge them an arm & a leg, then get rich & famous on their blood, sweat & tears, & make the same mistakes they did. That would make this the most prophetic drop I've ever penned, word to Nostradamus.
*These are just 2 examples. I'm sure, without effort, you can find many more, within arm's distance.
Showing posts with label lil wayne. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lil wayne. Show all posts
Monday, February 1, 2010
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Are You Guccified?
Gucci Mane is easily the most popular rapper right now. Ugh. Next to the dump truck loads of hate that T.I. is receiving for an early, early release, Gucci Gucci stays in people's mouths (no prison humor).
Not since Lil Wayne's proverbial apex roughly 2 years ago has there been such an even playing field of adoration & loathing. Really though, Gucci is one of only 2 rap acts on the Billboard top ten, as of today, or something like that. Don't quote me. Funny thing, I've only heard his music twice; on a family trip to Shreveport, Louisiana, where I don't necessarily expect them to know any better (no shots, but you should see some of their street lights), & at a DMV picnic, the perfect culmination of food, liquor & ignorance. Imagine the horror that surged my veins when I saw 8 year olds shaking their future thong holders to Gucci explaining the different ways he can beat up a vagina. My word, not his. Actually, there was one other time, but I didn't know it was Gooch until later. There was 3 extremely greasy young cats, smoking weed in their car, bouncing around & repeating "I'm the shit, bitch!" in time with the music. They couldn't have been older than 18, with their neon clad t-shirts & untamed multi-mullets. But, they looked like those 90 year old ladies who, when they get the Holy Ghost, James Brown up & down the church aisles. Silly, out-of-touch me, I had know idea what the big deal was, but my curiosity was piqued as they drove away in their Kia Sportage. Yeah, a Sportage, so they were probably gay too, in addition to being receptive to awesomely horrid "music". When I found out that was a Gucci Mane song, the puzzle pieces began to take shape. Those poor kids were being Guccified, right before my very eyes. Had I have known that then, I would've lunged into that little car, & attempted to rescue them from their fate. By now though, they've probably already gotten eyebrow & neck tattoos, & more neon shirts. Raekwon help us all.
I believe, in order to be a pop icon, there has to be an unlimited amount of ignorance within ink-covered arms distance. Remember how there was that one retarded kid at your school who EVERYBODY knew? Even the bullies, barely above him academically, had mad love for that critter. It's that same neanderthal appeal that draws massive amounts of clearly sane people into these pop culture phenomenons, subsequently lowering their standards & expectations to become part of the movement. Gucci Mane is as clearly a celebrity as he is a fool, so why would his celebration be any different? Answer: it's not.
Congratulations! You've been Guccified.
Nowadays, all the things that made a rapper an "MC" have been forsaken, lost, forgotten & replaced by the cloak of douchbaggery. Skills have taken a back seat to finance. When the argument is made that Gucci obviously lacks said skill set, the response in most cases is a warm-hearted, "Stop hatin', bitch! Gucci gettin' all dat paypah, fuck boy!". Or something to that effect. Talent is now overshadowed by appearance. Like a preacher; never mind how sincere his message may, or may not be, what truly matters how nice his suit & watch are, or in some cases, how fancy his robe is. Gucci is so high up on the "look at me" ladder that he doesn't even need to wear shirts. No clothing manufacturer's wares/wears can exemplify, or contain, such a tremendous amount of nigganometry. Seriously, Gucci is so hood that his magical tattoos probably incinerate shirts as soon as they touch his canvas-y flesh. Or maybe I'm over thinking it, & to him, it's not worth the hassle of pulling a $500 scmedium tee over your arms when they're covered with Wonder Woman bracelets & 2-3 divers watches.
[tony's note: gotta love that irony of divers watches on niggas that don't swim...]
For all Gucci Mane's mono-syllabic word play & modernized shuck & jive (complete with "chains & whips"), he seem cognizant enough to have embraced the concept of "hate". There are hordes, legions if you will, of anti-Gucci Maners, who spout nothing more than his hopeful demise. Publicity is publicity, whether good or abundantly bad. & on some level, he must understand that if one takes the time to say, or type "Fuck Gucci", then they have, in essence, taken the time to say, or type "Fuck Gucci". If he doesnt, then he wouldn't have so much zing in his voice when he scoffs at the haters who make him so, umm, popular. Dig, if X-amount of people continuously tell me how bad something is, at some point, if only out of sheer boredom, I'm going to try it at least once. Like the time I boned a really skinny girl just because I'd heard how unsatisfying an experience it would be.
[tony's other note: do not try that at home...]
My big homie Combat Jack had a drop on Daily-Math.com about how enamored he'd become with Gucci, against his will. Although I value his opinion as much as Dallas Penn's, I wasn't quite sold on giving G. Mane a voluntary listen until I got to the comments of the drop. "Wow", I thought aloud. 95% of the responses made this guy sound like the worst rapper ever. So naturally, I set aside any preconceived notions one would have about a nigga named "Gucci Mane", & gave him another shot. The music wasn't that bad. The music, meaning the instrumentation, production & mix-down of the song, mind you. The lyrics, however, made me feel like I forfeited my junior & senior years in high school. I found myself thinking twice before using any words with less than 3 syllables for the duration of that day. In his defense, though, I've never heard him say that he's the best rapper alive, or anything remotely close. I'm sure he'd confess to being extraordinarily mediocre, if his lexicon allowed either word. & I'm positive he couldn't care less about not having that accolade. Him receiving the newest cover of XXL doesn't help matters either, because there's undoubtedly a nation of under achieving up-&-coming rappers who'll follow his mold, without ever once attempting to be clever on the mic. & every time they see him count a stack of dough, or yank one of his slave chains in gaudy, tastless defiance, they'll lick their lips, knowing that the rap game ain't what it used to be.
Gucci Mane's success stems largely from his buffoonish behavior reaching comical levels. One would be hard pressed not to note that everytime he has an important album release date pending, he has an equally, if not more so, important court date looming as well. Coincidence? Possibly. Hilarious? Without a doubt. America's love affair for such stupidity is nothing new, but Hip Hop was an untapped resource for such idiocy about 15 years ago. Now, rappers provide just as much levity as Wee-man & Steve-O, back in their hey days, putting raw chickens in their adult diapers while wading a river chock with crocodiles. Imagine, as entertaining as "we" thought 50's online antics were over the last year or so, just imagine how funny it was to a room full of caucassian stuffed-shirts, who'd enjoy monkeys jumping around cages & throwing shit at each other just as much. If the monkey's hump trees, that's a bonus.
For what it's worth, God bless Gucci. I hope his success is long lasting. His kids should be straight, his bills should be paid, & just maybe he'll put all his profit to good use in his community. Yeah right. That nigga needs more jewelry & cars. He says so himself like, on every song. Even still, good luck & Godspeed Radrick, Dredrick, or whatever his momma named him.
Not since Lil Wayne's proverbial apex roughly 2 years ago has there been such an even playing field of adoration & loathing. Really though, Gucci is one of only 2 rap acts on the Billboard top ten, as of today, or something like that. Don't quote me. Funny thing, I've only heard his music twice; on a family trip to Shreveport, Louisiana, where I don't necessarily expect them to know any better (no shots, but you should see some of their street lights), & at a DMV picnic, the perfect culmination of food, liquor & ignorance. Imagine the horror that surged my veins when I saw 8 year olds shaking their future thong holders to Gucci explaining the different ways he can beat up a vagina. My word, not his. Actually, there was one other time, but I didn't know it was Gooch until later. There was 3 extremely greasy young cats, smoking weed in their car, bouncing around & repeating "I'm the shit, bitch!" in time with the music. They couldn't have been older than 18, with their neon clad t-shirts & untamed multi-mullets. But, they looked like those 90 year old ladies who, when they get the Holy Ghost, James Brown up & down the church aisles. Silly, out-of-touch me, I had know idea what the big deal was, but my curiosity was piqued as they drove away in their Kia Sportage. Yeah, a Sportage, so they were probably gay too, in addition to being receptive to awesomely horrid "music". When I found out that was a Gucci Mane song, the puzzle pieces began to take shape. Those poor kids were being Guccified, right before my very eyes. Had I have known that then, I would've lunged into that little car, & attempted to rescue them from their fate. By now though, they've probably already gotten eyebrow & neck tattoos, & more neon shirts. Raekwon help us all.
I believe, in order to be a pop icon, there has to be an unlimited amount of ignorance within ink-covered arms distance. Remember how there was that one retarded kid at your school who EVERYBODY knew? Even the bullies, barely above him academically, had mad love for that critter. It's that same neanderthal appeal that draws massive amounts of clearly sane people into these pop culture phenomenons, subsequently lowering their standards & expectations to become part of the movement. Gucci Mane is as clearly a celebrity as he is a fool, so why would his celebration be any different? Answer: it's not.
Congratulations! You've been Guccified.
Nowadays, all the things that made a rapper an "MC" have been forsaken, lost, forgotten & replaced by the cloak of douchbaggery. Skills have taken a back seat to finance. When the argument is made that Gucci obviously lacks said skill set, the response in most cases is a warm-hearted, "Stop hatin', bitch! Gucci gettin' all dat paypah, fuck boy!". Or something to that effect. Talent is now overshadowed by appearance. Like a preacher; never mind how sincere his message may, or may not be, what truly matters how nice his suit & watch are, or in some cases, how fancy his robe is. Gucci is so high up on the "look at me" ladder that he doesn't even need to wear shirts. No clothing manufacturer's wares/wears can exemplify, or contain, such a tremendous amount of nigganometry. Seriously, Gucci is so hood that his magical tattoos probably incinerate shirts as soon as they touch his canvas-y flesh. Or maybe I'm over thinking it, & to him, it's not worth the hassle of pulling a $500 scmedium tee over your arms when they're covered with Wonder Woman bracelets & 2-3 divers watches.
[tony's note: gotta love that irony of divers watches on niggas that don't swim...]
For all Gucci Mane's mono-syllabic word play & modernized shuck & jive (complete with "chains & whips"), he seem cognizant enough to have embraced the concept of "hate". There are hordes, legions if you will, of anti-Gucci Maners, who spout nothing more than his hopeful demise. Publicity is publicity, whether good or abundantly bad. & on some level, he must understand that if one takes the time to say, or type "Fuck Gucci", then they have, in essence, taken the time to say, or type "Fuck Gucci". If he doesnt, then he wouldn't have so much zing in his voice when he scoffs at the haters who make him so, umm, popular. Dig, if X-amount of people continuously tell me how bad something is, at some point, if only out of sheer boredom, I'm going to try it at least once. Like the time I boned a really skinny girl just because I'd heard how unsatisfying an experience it would be.
[tony's other note: do not try that at home...]
My big homie Combat Jack had a drop on Daily-Math.com about how enamored he'd become with Gucci, against his will. Although I value his opinion as much as Dallas Penn's, I wasn't quite sold on giving G. Mane a voluntary listen until I got to the comments of the drop. "Wow", I thought aloud. 95% of the responses made this guy sound like the worst rapper ever. So naturally, I set aside any preconceived notions one would have about a nigga named "Gucci Mane", & gave him another shot. The music wasn't that bad. The music, meaning the instrumentation, production & mix-down of the song, mind you. The lyrics, however, made me feel like I forfeited my junior & senior years in high school. I found myself thinking twice before using any words with less than 3 syllables for the duration of that day. In his defense, though, I've never heard him say that he's the best rapper alive, or anything remotely close. I'm sure he'd confess to being extraordinarily mediocre, if his lexicon allowed either word. & I'm positive he couldn't care less about not having that accolade. Him receiving the newest cover of XXL doesn't help matters either, because there's undoubtedly a nation of under achieving up-&-coming rappers who'll follow his mold, without ever once attempting to be clever on the mic. & every time they see him count a stack of dough, or yank one of his slave chains in gaudy, tastless defiance, they'll lick their lips, knowing that the rap game ain't what it used to be.
Gucci Mane's success stems largely from his buffoonish behavior reaching comical levels. One would be hard pressed not to note that everytime he has an important album release date pending, he has an equally, if not more so, important court date looming as well. Coincidence? Possibly. Hilarious? Without a doubt. America's love affair for such stupidity is nothing new, but Hip Hop was an untapped resource for such idiocy about 15 years ago. Now, rappers provide just as much levity as Wee-man & Steve-O, back in their hey days, putting raw chickens in their adult diapers while wading a river chock with crocodiles. Imagine, as entertaining as "we" thought 50's online antics were over the last year or so, just imagine how funny it was to a room full of caucassian stuffed-shirts, who'd enjoy monkeys jumping around cages & throwing shit at each other just as much. If the monkey's hump trees, that's a bonus.
For what it's worth, God bless Gucci. I hope his success is long lasting. His kids should be straight, his bills should be paid, & just maybe he'll put all his profit to good use in his community. Yeah right. That nigga needs more jewelry & cars. He says so himself like, on every song. Even still, good luck & Godspeed Radrick, Dredrick, or whatever his momma named him.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
...word to David Blaine.
It's almost that time, people.
ATLien ex-trap rapper Clifford Harris d/b/a T.I.(P.) is set to be released from federal custody within the next several months. Appropriately, the 'Net is buzzing with his name again. If you're not familiar with his year-ish prison term for attempting to purchase a mexican village's amount of firepower, then congrats! That means that you actually have a life rife with things of genuine importance. Unless, of course, you're a denizen of the world wide Hip Hop community, & it's surrogate attachment to the World Wide Web, where information is never limited or scarce. & in that case, you know almost every detail of this man's life.
In reality though, none of us truly know what this dude's been through over the past couple of years. A chain of events that more or less began with his best friend/personal assistant Philant Johnson being shot & killed in front of him. An act that T.I. has shouldered the responsibility for. So much so, that immediately following, T.I. apparently decided it was necessary to take matters into his own hands. Or at least take the steps to do so, attempting to purchase said weaponry for speculated retaliation. Fast track to today, with his pending release date from a mid-west federal facility being tossed back & forth between gossip websites & teenage girl's big mouths. After his conviction, but before his "leave of absence", Clifford went balls to the wall on a campaign to change the lives of at-risk young adults, even going so far as to having a reality show geared toward their self betterment. A proverbial road to redemption, as opposed to their obvious roads to perdition.
With being a spectacle, comes backlash. T.I. has been called a snitch, bitch & everything in between since his relatively light sentence was handed down. Even some of the "fans" he had turned their respective backs, based on nothing but second hand rambling & mere speculation. For legal insights, though, email Combat Jack. It's always entertaining to read/see/hear all the negative energy hurled at this man out of sheer ignorance, or a half-assed "knowledge" of how the legal system operates. Of all the derogatory slurs thrown around in regards to T.I., who most of these critics have never met, & won't ever meet, "fraud" is my personal favorite. In the last 3 days alone, I've read/seen/heard him called a fraud more times then the requisite "snitch".
Word? What exactly did he do to be labeled a fraud? Please, someone clarify this for me. & really, save the "keep it real" speech for underage pot heads who believe the government is tapping their cell phone & AIDS is only a Black man's disease.
Case in point; Bernie Madoff. He lied, schemed, scammed, shimmied, fanagled, hornswaggled & nigga-rigged his was to a fortune, ruining thousands of unsuspecting lives along the way. Bernie Madoff is a fraud, really though.
Arnold Schwarzeneggar. He lied, mislead, made empty promises, proposed change, ran smear campaigns, all for the sake of becoming California's governor, only to turn around & destroy it's economy, ruin it's job market, punish hard working citizens with layoffs & furloughs, etc. Arnold Schwarzeneggar is a fraud, really though.
Milli Vanilli. God bless the dead one, with their awesome lip-syncing, horrible hair extensions, & those ridiculous biker shorts/sports coat combos, was a fraud, really though.
Dig?
If anything, from my vantage point, he seems to have fallen victim of not being able to make the discernment between real & fake. Although, I believe that now, it's an easier task to accomplish. Prison has a way of enlightening cats beyond their perceptions of themselves. After all, it is intended rehabilitation, & I, for one, think that it works, for the most part. I've said it before, I predict he'll reemerge anew, with a story to tell & a lesson to teach. If I'm wrong, he's a douche nozzle, & deserves every bit of ill will he receives. Somebody's gotta take a stand against negative lifestyles & fabricated realities. So, why not somebody millions of misguided kids, & their equally as misguided parents, listen to?
But, beyond his ordeal, is the fact that so many rap fans take Hip Hop music as some sort of tutorial for life. It's not. Not one iota. Especially the rap dudes who make truck loads of money by pimping their perverted fantasies. In all realness, what they say can be 100% truth, but by no stretch of imagination does that qualify it to be studied, followed, & executed like some sort of history lesson. If I believed everything rappers said, I'd have dozens of kids, millions of ill-gotten dollars & multiple charges on me, from kidnapping to drug trafficking to murder. I used to listen to Eminem heavy. That alone would have had me in a padded room, word to 'Bonnie & Clyde'.
Just because T.I. had some street-worthy lyrics about a lifestyle that he may or may not have partaken in, doesn't make him a role model. Therefore, why does anything he says have any weight? My dad used to tell me all the time, as a kid, "don't smoke cigarettes." He did this, as he...smoked a cigarette. Did I call him a fraud? Was he fake? Or a bitch? Of course not, & this is a man that I've loved all my life. Clearly I'd be hurt if he didn't practice what he preached. So, how is it that a complete stranger, who the only connection I have with is through anonymous music, can hurt me so much with words without any tangible girth? Well not me, but you smell my cologne.
Maybe it's the lack of things the youth have to grab on to, that makes us gravitate towards bull shit, then cry "Bull shit!" when we knew it was bull shit all along. Or maybe, since there are no more heroes, we turn to bright & shiny things, like moths, in hopes of something that's not really there. Entertainment is the biggest optical/auditory illusion ever. Everybody involved in it is no different than David Blaine as far as I am concerned, & I know damn well that nigga can't fly, catch a bullet in his teeth or hold his breath for a week straight, even though I've seen him do all those things with my own eyes.
[tony's note: weezy might prolly wanna get in touch with blaine right about now, & learn the art of invisibility...]
ATLien ex-trap rapper Clifford Harris d/b/a T.I.(P.) is set to be released from federal custody within the next several months. Appropriately, the 'Net is buzzing with his name again. If you're not familiar with his year-ish prison term for attempting to purchase a mexican village's amount of firepower, then congrats! That means that you actually have a life rife with things of genuine importance. Unless, of course, you're a denizen of the world wide Hip Hop community, & it's surrogate attachment to the World Wide Web, where information is never limited or scarce. & in that case, you know almost every detail of this man's life.
In reality though, none of us truly know what this dude's been through over the past couple of years. A chain of events that more or less began with his best friend/personal assistant Philant Johnson being shot & killed in front of him. An act that T.I. has shouldered the responsibility for. So much so, that immediately following, T.I. apparently decided it was necessary to take matters into his own hands. Or at least take the steps to do so, attempting to purchase said weaponry for speculated retaliation. Fast track to today, with his pending release date from a mid-west federal facility being tossed back & forth between gossip websites & teenage girl's big mouths. After his conviction, but before his "leave of absence", Clifford went balls to the wall on a campaign to change the lives of at-risk young adults, even going so far as to having a reality show geared toward their self betterment. A proverbial road to redemption, as opposed to their obvious roads to perdition.
With being a spectacle, comes backlash. T.I. has been called a snitch, bitch & everything in between since his relatively light sentence was handed down. Even some of the "fans" he had turned their respective backs, based on nothing but second hand rambling & mere speculation. For legal insights, though, email Combat Jack. It's always entertaining to read/see/hear all the negative energy hurled at this man out of sheer ignorance, or a half-assed "knowledge" of how the legal system operates. Of all the derogatory slurs thrown around in regards to T.I., who most of these critics have never met, & won't ever meet, "fraud" is my personal favorite. In the last 3 days alone, I've read/seen/heard him called a fraud more times then the requisite "snitch".
Word? What exactly did he do to be labeled a fraud? Please, someone clarify this for me. & really, save the "keep it real" speech for underage pot heads who believe the government is tapping their cell phone & AIDS is only a Black man's disease.
Case in point; Bernie Madoff. He lied, schemed, scammed, shimmied, fanagled, hornswaggled & nigga-rigged his was to a fortune, ruining thousands of unsuspecting lives along the way. Bernie Madoff is a fraud, really though.
Arnold Schwarzeneggar. He lied, mislead, made empty promises, proposed change, ran smear campaigns, all for the sake of becoming California's governor, only to turn around & destroy it's economy, ruin it's job market, punish hard working citizens with layoffs & furloughs, etc. Arnold Schwarzeneggar is a fraud, really though.
Milli Vanilli. God bless the dead one, with their awesome lip-syncing, horrible hair extensions, & those ridiculous biker shorts/sports coat combos, was a fraud, really though.
Dig?
If anything, from my vantage point, he seems to have fallen victim of not being able to make the discernment between real & fake. Although, I believe that now, it's an easier task to accomplish. Prison has a way of enlightening cats beyond their perceptions of themselves. After all, it is intended rehabilitation, & I, for one, think that it works, for the most part. I've said it before, I predict he'll reemerge anew, with a story to tell & a lesson to teach. If I'm wrong, he's a douche nozzle, & deserves every bit of ill will he receives. Somebody's gotta take a stand against negative lifestyles & fabricated realities. So, why not somebody millions of misguided kids, & their equally as misguided parents, listen to?
But, beyond his ordeal, is the fact that so many rap fans take Hip Hop music as some sort of tutorial for life. It's not. Not one iota. Especially the rap dudes who make truck loads of money by pimping their perverted fantasies. In all realness, what they say can be 100% truth, but by no stretch of imagination does that qualify it to be studied, followed, & executed like some sort of history lesson. If I believed everything rappers said, I'd have dozens of kids, millions of ill-gotten dollars & multiple charges on me, from kidnapping to drug trafficking to murder. I used to listen to Eminem heavy. That alone would have had me in a padded room, word to 'Bonnie & Clyde'.
Just because T.I. had some street-worthy lyrics about a lifestyle that he may or may not have partaken in, doesn't make him a role model. Therefore, why does anything he says have any weight? My dad used to tell me all the time, as a kid, "don't smoke cigarettes." He did this, as he...smoked a cigarette. Did I call him a fraud? Was he fake? Or a bitch? Of course not, & this is a man that I've loved all my life. Clearly I'd be hurt if he didn't practice what he preached. So, how is it that a complete stranger, who the only connection I have with is through anonymous music, can hurt me so much with words without any tangible girth? Well not me, but you smell my cologne.
Maybe it's the lack of things the youth have to grab on to, that makes us gravitate towards bull shit, then cry "Bull shit!" when we knew it was bull shit all along. Or maybe, since there are no more heroes, we turn to bright & shiny things, like moths, in hopes of something that's not really there. Entertainment is the biggest optical/auditory illusion ever. Everybody involved in it is no different than David Blaine as far as I am concerned, & I know damn well that nigga can't fly, catch a bullet in his teeth or hold his breath for a week straight, even though I've seen him do all those things with my own eyes.
[tony's note: weezy might prolly wanna get in touch with blaine right about now, & learn the art of invisibility...]
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
D.I.Y. or D-I-E!
You guy's remember Drake? Yeah, the rap dude from Canada with the prosthetic knee. I bet you been waiting on his album to drop, haven't you? You ain't gotta lie, that's why we use screen names & shit. 'Thank Me Later' was pushed back twice already this year, despite the overwhelming buzz, the major label re-release of his mixtape 'So Far Gone', 2 grammy nominations, & countless features throughout the latter half of the year. After January's date was shafted, It was scheduled to be released on Valentine's Day of 2010, but again, no dice. Drake was selling out shows & doing PR work before he even signed with Young Money. Some might say, including me, he was a bigger star without "anyone" helping him.
Drake is what you call a Grade Curve Axis. Like it or not, 2009 success was graded according to what he did. If you had an album on a shelf, & weren't as popular as this dude, with his only offering being a mixtape, & then the rehashing of said mixtape, then you didn't do well enough.
In industry terms, dude was the complete package: built-in fan base, good looking [||], penchant for crafting music teenagers can get pregnant to, & he had the co-sign of Lil Wayne, arguably the most relevant rapper of the last couple of years. Yet & still, he received as many album releases speed bumps as the most established dudes. Odd, no? He was rap music's poster boy, & with the snap of some old White guy's fingers, he's in limbo, much like your favorite rapper.
I predict that 2010 will see many more artists going the independent route, permanently. Before, indie was the yellow brick road to major stardom. I don't see that staying the same, what with the industry climate, & recession & more wack rappers getting shine than I can shake a wack stick at. Guys like Charles Hamilton, who had the right idea but failed miserably, will become the norm. After all, an artist's dream is to be paid for their masterpieces. That's not going to happen though, as long as the entertainer allows record executives to have sex with their futures. Might as well masturbate, so to speak, & be solely in charge of the outcome.
[tony's note: ha! i didn't notice that zinger until I typed it!...]
Wanna be rap stars beware. These labels aren't playing fair, have no interest in your prosperity, & would quicker leave you a penniless bum than make you a star. When I was younger, phase 2 of being a "rapper" was trotting your demo tape into an office & meeting some douche nozzle A&R, with the hopes of tickling his fancy [||] enough to be considered on their roster. Nowadays, the requirements are hoops & hurdles so extreme that, by the time you make a name for yourself, what would you need a label for. It's pimping & pandering, & niggas are lining up to go pro. Or, maybe not.
We can all thank Soulja Boy for having the balls to go for broke on his own laurels & scruples. This one goofy kid turned to 'Net into his personal billboard, & that move took him to the top of Billboard. Anybody who doubted him is surely kicking themselves in the ass while their great-grandparents "superman that hoe" at their 50th wedding anniversary. His was a definite game changer, & not a trend as the big whigs hoped it would be. Maybe if they wise up, the recording industry can salvage whatever control of our ears they have left. People don't want to hear what "they" want us to hear, & that's why radio is dying as I type. Even satellite radio is catching a bad rap. What happened with the radio was tasteless program directors, payola, & a tainted musical gene pool, offering little-to-no talent. Who the fuck wants to hear a Flo Rida song, much less in constant rotation between 4 different shows? Those with the talent were relegated to the underground circuit, or the DJ mix shows that only spun real rap from 12 to 2 AM. They would've been better not playing those albums at all, because when the people noticed that there's still good music to be had, they demanded it. & when those jerks refused to play "good" music, opting instead to shove overwhelming amounts of monkey shit down our collective throats, the radio lost all credibility as a reliably source of music. At that exact point, the 'Net became the place to be. & has been ever since. The last time I listened to urban radio, G-Unit was still selling records.
My dad always said, "If you want something done right, do it yourself". Word. Once rappers truly understand how easily that can be achieved, labels better take notice or get turned off, just like the radio.
Drake is what you call a Grade Curve Axis. Like it or not, 2009 success was graded according to what he did. If you had an album on a shelf, & weren't as popular as this dude, with his only offering being a mixtape, & then the rehashing of said mixtape, then you didn't do well enough.
In industry terms, dude was the complete package: built-in fan base, good looking [||], penchant for crafting music teenagers can get pregnant to, & he had the co-sign of Lil Wayne, arguably the most relevant rapper of the last couple of years. Yet & still, he received as many album releases speed bumps as the most established dudes. Odd, no? He was rap music's poster boy, & with the snap of some old White guy's fingers, he's in limbo, much like your favorite rapper.
I predict that 2010 will see many more artists going the independent route, permanently. Before, indie was the yellow brick road to major stardom. I don't see that staying the same, what with the industry climate, & recession & more wack rappers getting shine than I can shake a wack stick at. Guys like Charles Hamilton, who had the right idea but failed miserably, will become the norm. After all, an artist's dream is to be paid for their masterpieces. That's not going to happen though, as long as the entertainer allows record executives to have sex with their futures. Might as well masturbate, so to speak, & be solely in charge of the outcome.
[tony's note: ha! i didn't notice that zinger until I typed it!...]
Wanna be rap stars beware. These labels aren't playing fair, have no interest in your prosperity, & would quicker leave you a penniless bum than make you a star. When I was younger, phase 2 of being a "rapper" was trotting your demo tape into an office & meeting some douche nozzle A&R, with the hopes of tickling his fancy [||] enough to be considered on their roster. Nowadays, the requirements are hoops & hurdles so extreme that, by the time you make a name for yourself, what would you need a label for. It's pimping & pandering, & niggas are lining up to go pro. Or, maybe not.
We can all thank Soulja Boy for having the balls to go for broke on his own laurels & scruples. This one goofy kid turned to 'Net into his personal billboard, & that move took him to the top of Billboard. Anybody who doubted him is surely kicking themselves in the ass while their great-grandparents "superman that hoe" at their 50th wedding anniversary. His was a definite game changer, & not a trend as the big whigs hoped it would be. Maybe if they wise up, the recording industry can salvage whatever control of our ears they have left. People don't want to hear what "they" want us to hear, & that's why radio is dying as I type. Even satellite radio is catching a bad rap. What happened with the radio was tasteless program directors, payola, & a tainted musical gene pool, offering little-to-no talent. Who the fuck wants to hear a Flo Rida song, much less in constant rotation between 4 different shows? Those with the talent were relegated to the underground circuit, or the DJ mix shows that only spun real rap from 12 to 2 AM. They would've been better not playing those albums at all, because when the people noticed that there's still good music to be had, they demanded it. & when those jerks refused to play "good" music, opting instead to shove overwhelming amounts of monkey shit down our collective throats, the radio lost all credibility as a reliably source of music. At that exact point, the 'Net became the place to be. & has been ever since. The last time I listened to urban radio, G-Unit was still selling records.
My dad always said, "If you want something done right, do it yourself". Word. Once rappers truly understand how easily that can be achieved, labels better take notice or get turned off, just like the radio.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Clifford's Footsteps
Remember when rap star TI became a completely different person? Prior to the murder of his best friend/personal assistant Philant Johnson, & being busted attempting to buy illegal assault rifles, TI was as much a part of the "problem" as every other rapper who raps without conscious. He glorified violence, materialism, genocide, bragged about his criminal activities & made no apologies about doing so. "Trap rap" was the term coined in regards to him, & many other MC's from his region based on their affection & glamorization of the drug dealer lifestyle. TI became the poster D(ope)-boy for the movement.
Suddenly, he had a couple changes of heart, most likely caused by actuality catching up to him in real-time. He found himself being bitten by the frozen snake he found in the woods. His friend died in his arms, his bodyguard sold him up the river, & already being a convicted felon, he was facing a substantial amount of his life being given to the "system" for his criminal charges. His outlook dramatically changed, seemingly overnight. He began lecturing the youth at school across the country, speaking at rallies about the importance of voting, & starred in an arguably successful reality show aimed at rehabilitating misguided kids before it was too late. He made it clear that he regretted what his life had become, & even warned kids about making similar mistakes on a few talk show couches. The album he recorded while awaiting his day of confinement has been hailed as his most successul, & ironically, his most uplifting & positive release. His relese date is in February, & that will be the hour which he proves himself a changed man, or that the last two years of his life was all merely song & dance.
Only a fool sees prison as a respectable badge of honor. That's like bragging about overdosing on heroin, but surviving. Being arrested is one thing-you can get arrested for indecent exposure, public drunkenness, disturbing the peace, etc. But being found guilty of whatever charges, & going to prison (not a holding cell), is reality at it's most intimate. Case(s) in point; my uncle got locked up for drug trafficking, did almost a decade, came home & has NEVER spoken about what transpired, except to say what degrees he'd obtained. My cousin, coincidentally one of the toughest niggas I've ever met, is serving 25 to life for armored car robbery & attempt murder, & within the last few years has found God & is now studying theology. A close friend of mine is doing a several years on an assault charge, & his letters reek of despair, loneliness & regret. Before he got locked up this last time, he made it a point to speak out about how prison isn't where any of us want to be. He was adamant in his disdain. Hopefully, this time will be his last. All three of these men are nothing short of "gangsta", yet it's obvious that prison time has affected them in ways that even a tumultuous street life couldn't.
Every other month, there seems to be another rapper going to jail. The oddity isn't in the fact that they've committed crimes & ultimately had to "pay their debt to society", but that only Clifford Harris has spoken in regards to this being the inescapable result of unwise decision making. I wonder if Lil Wayne will fully utilize his popularity & tell the millions of impressionable teenagers worldwide that, if they don't smarten up, this is what could happen? No dice, I'm sure. That's quite a bit of pressure to put on a man who earns a heavy pay load by being a negative influence.
Rapper Lil Boosie was sentenced to a year over a gun charge, & all he could do was brag about how "it's nothing". Never once did he tell his supporters publicly, "Don't do what I did". He softens the blow by making it appear to be just a stumbling block to be dismissed & forgotten.
There's a rapper in the Bay Area, CA, that goes by the name "The Jacka" who last year, released a mix tape dedicated to the incarcerated. I understand his sentiments, because I truly believe a man's heart can not be judged solely by his instinctive actions, but if you have to do the time, the least we can do is let kids know that it's not a movie, video game, rap fantasy or "time-out". It's punishment, & punishment should be treated as a tool for future prosperity, rather than glorified war story.
I know better than to believe an artist has the responsibility of mentoring their fans, but at least have some decency about it. C-Murder, convicted of murder, hasn't said one thing positive to the "fans" who supported him. His story ends with "live how you get it" or "die by the sword", when some of the youth would take a "think twice about what's important" to heart just as eagerly. I hear people talk about how there's a lack of guidance in our communities, & I disagree. The guidance is there, but it's dispensed from all the wrong people, places & things.
The thing I love about mistakes is that when I get through them, I can share with my people how/why it happened to me & how they can avoid it. & I don't have to take a goody-goody stance & denounce any aspects of life to help a lesson get learned, becaused I lived it. Hopefully more rappers will follow Clifford's footsteps, & educate the youngters to the true nature of voluntary enslavement, tax monies for prisoners & the infrastructure designed to empower failure.
Much respect to the dudes who did their time & came home ready to make a difference. The truth is, we need more cats to show the positive sides of negative situations. In the words of the Real Freeway Ricky Ross, "I'm out now, & it's time to make things happen".
Suddenly, he had a couple changes of heart, most likely caused by actuality catching up to him in real-time. He found himself being bitten by the frozen snake he found in the woods. His friend died in his arms, his bodyguard sold him up the river, & already being a convicted felon, he was facing a substantial amount of his life being given to the "system" for his criminal charges. His outlook dramatically changed, seemingly overnight. He began lecturing the youth at school across the country, speaking at rallies about the importance of voting, & starred in an arguably successful reality show aimed at rehabilitating misguided kids before it was too late. He made it clear that he regretted what his life had become, & even warned kids about making similar mistakes on a few talk show couches. The album he recorded while awaiting his day of confinement has been hailed as his most successul, & ironically, his most uplifting & positive release. His relese date is in February, & that will be the hour which he proves himself a changed man, or that the last two years of his life was all merely song & dance.
Only a fool sees prison as a respectable badge of honor. That's like bragging about overdosing on heroin, but surviving. Being arrested is one thing-you can get arrested for indecent exposure, public drunkenness, disturbing the peace, etc. But being found guilty of whatever charges, & going to prison (not a holding cell), is reality at it's most intimate. Case(s) in point; my uncle got locked up for drug trafficking, did almost a decade, came home & has NEVER spoken about what transpired, except to say what degrees he'd obtained. My cousin, coincidentally one of the toughest niggas I've ever met, is serving 25 to life for armored car robbery & attempt murder, & within the last few years has found God & is now studying theology. A close friend of mine is doing a several years on an assault charge, & his letters reek of despair, loneliness & regret. Before he got locked up this last time, he made it a point to speak out about how prison isn't where any of us want to be. He was adamant in his disdain. Hopefully, this time will be his last. All three of these men are nothing short of "gangsta", yet it's obvious that prison time has affected them in ways that even a tumultuous street life couldn't.
Every other month, there seems to be another rapper going to jail. The oddity isn't in the fact that they've committed crimes & ultimately had to "pay their debt to society", but that only Clifford Harris has spoken in regards to this being the inescapable result of unwise decision making. I wonder if Lil Wayne will fully utilize his popularity & tell the millions of impressionable teenagers worldwide that, if they don't smarten up, this is what could happen? No dice, I'm sure. That's quite a bit of pressure to put on a man who earns a heavy pay load by being a negative influence.
Rapper Lil Boosie was sentenced to a year over a gun charge, & all he could do was brag about how "it's nothing". Never once did he tell his supporters publicly, "Don't do what I did". He softens the blow by making it appear to be just a stumbling block to be dismissed & forgotten.
There's a rapper in the Bay Area, CA, that goes by the name "The Jacka" who last year, released a mix tape dedicated to the incarcerated. I understand his sentiments, because I truly believe a man's heart can not be judged solely by his instinctive actions, but if you have to do the time, the least we can do is let kids know that it's not a movie, video game, rap fantasy or "time-out". It's punishment, & punishment should be treated as a tool for future prosperity, rather than glorified war story.
I know better than to believe an artist has the responsibility of mentoring their fans, but at least have some decency about it. C-Murder, convicted of murder, hasn't said one thing positive to the "fans" who supported him. His story ends with "live how you get it" or "die by the sword", when some of the youth would take a "think twice about what's important" to heart just as eagerly. I hear people talk about how there's a lack of guidance in our communities, & I disagree. The guidance is there, but it's dispensed from all the wrong people, places & things.
The thing I love about mistakes is that when I get through them, I can share with my people how/why it happened to me & how they can avoid it. & I don't have to take a goody-goody stance & denounce any aspects of life to help a lesson get learned, becaused I lived it. Hopefully more rappers will follow Clifford's footsteps, & educate the youngters to the true nature of voluntary enslavement, tax monies for prisoners & the infrastructure designed to empower failure.
Much respect to the dudes who did their time & came home ready to make a difference. The truth is, we need more cats to show the positive sides of negative situations. In the words of the Real Freeway Ricky Ross, "I'm out now, & it's time to make things happen".
Friday, October 23, 2009
BREAKING NEWS: Lil Wayne Is Better Than Jay-Z, & Has More Money!
Leave it to Bryan "Baby, Birdman" Williams to make sure that his payche-I mean, artist/adopted son Dwayne "Lil Wayne" Carter stays in the spotlight. Actually, it's not like Lil Wayne ever really leaves the spotlight, or is in need of extra shine time. Between releasing arguably good songs from equally as entertaining albums, tag-teaming the female population with his heart throb protege Drake, unleashing the latest rapping stripper, Nicki Minaj, on an awaiting public, impregnating what seems to be every girl he has sex with, & crisscrossing the country to deal with legal problems from drugs to guns to copyright infringement, one would be had pressed to forget the guy exists. I even heard 'Lollipop' blaring out of this zesty character's Scion the other day. I really didn't think anyone still listened to that song outloud, but leave it to a sexually confused teenage boy to prove me wrong.
This December looks to be a promising one for both Wayne & Baby, as their record company conglomerate, Young Money & Cash Money Records, respectively, prepare to release upwards of 10 (ten) albums. Rightfully so, Baby, who refers to Wayne as his son & signifies such sentiment by kissing Wayne on the lips publicly, has decided to give the Hip Hop world reasons to begin taking about Wayne in preparation of their approaching pay day. Oh, did I mention that Baby bought Wayne a watch for his birthday, estimated at roughly $1 million & got Wayne's birth date tattooed on top of his other tattoos?
In an interview for Tropical TV, Baby was asked about colleague Jay-Z being named the "Top MC in the game" by Mtv.
Said Baby: "I don't think he is the number one emcee in no kind of way. Wayne's the best. He do the most and he make the most money. I don't think no nigga in the business make more money than us".
Us? Freudian slip perhaps? Or maybe Baby is so confident in his ownership of all things Weezy that he doesn't feel a need to censor his entitlement.
"How can you be the best if you don't make the most money? And you don't do the most? Lyrically, come on man, be for real, can't nobody fuck with Wayne. If you number one and you ain't getting no money it don't mean nothing".
& here I was, thinking that Shawn "Jay-Z" Carter was doing all right or himself. If $250,000 cars, private jets & black blood diamonds fresh out of an African mine workers hands isn't "getting money", then I'm further beneath the poverty line then my paycheck alludes to.
"To me, it's 'who's making the most money'? That's number one to me. Fuck all that rap shit. I don't give a fuck about the rest of that shit. Maybe other ones do, but if you making money, that matters to me."
Thats exactly what I'd expect from one of the game's simplest MC's ever. In fact, the age old debate of the difference between a rapper & an MC can be quelled with one listen to any verse penned by Baby. Dude is further from being an MC than Elizabeth Taylor's housekeeper. He's barely a rapper, & that's only because sometimes he rhymes words, & even then, not all that well. For the sake of argument, younger crowds will usually side with Wayne being the better artist, lyrically, but an older crowd will quickly point out that Jay has 10 #1 albums under his belt, countless #1 singles & has sustained relevance in an industry where attention spans are shorter Amber Rose's hair.
That's not to say that Wayne's without achievements & accolades of his own, such as his 'Tha Carter 3' selling over 3,200,000 copies as of July, but he's far from reaching the same level of notoriety as Jay-Z. Case in point, what Dwayne is attempting with the phantom 'Rebirth' album, Jay-Z accomplished on the million-plus selling collaboration with rap rockers Linkin Park, 'Collision Course', years ago. & Jay-Z has never taken a picture holding a guitar that everyone knows he can't play. Just saying.
Hip Hop is possibly the most competitive of all genres of music. Where else do they dedicate entire records to one another for the sake of conveying a point that a simple showing of the middle finger could? What other forms of music find it's performers fist-fighting, & occasionally shooting at each other's baggage handlers over a lyric? Baby's statement is representative of a bigger, more ominous problem. The art form has been replaced by the business protocol, & it's subsequent result. If a product doesn't garner (an excessive amount of) revenue, in Hip Hop at least, it's widely viewed a failure by the vast majority of it's fickle, yet easily appeased listeners. The irony of Birdman's douche nozzle attitude, is that Jay-Z has successfully navigated both critical acclaim & fiscal success, long before Baby's golden child became addicted to cough syrup & unprotected sex. Personally, I feel that had Wayne been aware that Baby had intentions of such a counterproductive tirade, he would've advised against it.
Record sales are an optical illusion; used to provide insight on how well the artist is doing & generally as a demographic based selling marker. It doesn't determine who's the better rapper. That's up to the consumer to decide. Keeping in mind that exposure is usually the main point of record sells, if no one has heard of you, how could you be expected to sell zillions of units, even with the inclusion of the 'Net? Youtube can only take the unlucky ones so far.
In general, I wouldn't say that Lil Wayne is better than Jay-Z, per se. But, that's veritable apples & oranges, being that Hip Hop has no uniform sound to which it adheres. They are, however, the best at their respective crafts. Weezy's good at hormone-exciting, teenage pregnancy rap, while Jay's lane is reminding the 40 & over Hip Hop head that we still count for more than reminiscing about Run DMC & shaking our fists at whipper-snappers.
As long as we have artists who continue to treat Hip Hop as the artistic outlet it was created to be, I don't believe the culture will implode & cease to exist. But in the meantime, beware. Baby's not the only cat that has such an obtuse, skewered view of what dictates penchant. Hell, Jay-Z's not that far removed from the problem himself.
This December looks to be a promising one for both Wayne & Baby, as their record company conglomerate, Young Money & Cash Money Records, respectively, prepare to release upwards of 10 (ten) albums. Rightfully so, Baby, who refers to Wayne as his son & signifies such sentiment by kissing Wayne on the lips publicly, has decided to give the Hip Hop world reasons to begin taking about Wayne in preparation of their approaching pay day. Oh, did I mention that Baby bought Wayne a watch for his birthday, estimated at roughly $1 million & got Wayne's birth date tattooed on top of his other tattoos?
In an interview for Tropical TV, Baby was asked about colleague Jay-Z being named the "Top MC in the game" by Mtv.
Said Baby: "I don't think he is the number one emcee in no kind of way. Wayne's the best. He do the most and he make the most money. I don't think no nigga in the business make more money than us".
Us? Freudian slip perhaps? Or maybe Baby is so confident in his ownership of all things Weezy that he doesn't feel a need to censor his entitlement.
"How can you be the best if you don't make the most money? And you don't do the most? Lyrically, come on man, be for real, can't nobody fuck with Wayne. If you number one and you ain't getting no money it don't mean nothing".
& here I was, thinking that Shawn "Jay-Z" Carter was doing all right or himself. If $250,000 cars, private jets & black blood diamonds fresh out of an African mine workers hands isn't "getting money", then I'm further beneath the poverty line then my paycheck alludes to.
"To me, it's 'who's making the most money'? That's number one to me. Fuck all that rap shit. I don't give a fuck about the rest of that shit. Maybe other ones do, but if you making money, that matters to me."
Thats exactly what I'd expect from one of the game's simplest MC's ever. In fact, the age old debate of the difference between a rapper & an MC can be quelled with one listen to any verse penned by Baby. Dude is further from being an MC than Elizabeth Taylor's housekeeper. He's barely a rapper, & that's only because sometimes he rhymes words, & even then, not all that well. For the sake of argument, younger crowds will usually side with Wayne being the better artist, lyrically, but an older crowd will quickly point out that Jay has 10 #1 albums under his belt, countless #1 singles & has sustained relevance in an industry where attention spans are shorter Amber Rose's hair.
That's not to say that Wayne's without achievements & accolades of his own, such as his 'Tha Carter 3' selling over 3,200,000 copies as of July, but he's far from reaching the same level of notoriety as Jay-Z. Case in point, what Dwayne is attempting with the phantom 'Rebirth' album, Jay-Z accomplished on the million-plus selling collaboration with rap rockers Linkin Park, 'Collision Course', years ago. & Jay-Z has never taken a picture holding a guitar that everyone knows he can't play. Just saying.
Hip Hop is possibly the most competitive of all genres of music. Where else do they dedicate entire records to one another for the sake of conveying a point that a simple showing of the middle finger could? What other forms of music find it's performers fist-fighting, & occasionally shooting at each other's baggage handlers over a lyric? Baby's statement is representative of a bigger, more ominous problem. The art form has been replaced by the business protocol, & it's subsequent result. If a product doesn't garner (an excessive amount of) revenue, in Hip Hop at least, it's widely viewed a failure by the vast majority of it's fickle, yet easily appeased listeners. The irony of Birdman's douche nozzle attitude, is that Jay-Z has successfully navigated both critical acclaim & fiscal success, long before Baby's golden child became addicted to cough syrup & unprotected sex. Personally, I feel that had Wayne been aware that Baby had intentions of such a counterproductive tirade, he would've advised against it.
Record sales are an optical illusion; used to provide insight on how well the artist is doing & generally as a demographic based selling marker. It doesn't determine who's the better rapper. That's up to the consumer to decide. Keeping in mind that exposure is usually the main point of record sells, if no one has heard of you, how could you be expected to sell zillions of units, even with the inclusion of the 'Net? Youtube can only take the unlucky ones so far.
In general, I wouldn't say that Lil Wayne is better than Jay-Z, per se. But, that's veritable apples & oranges, being that Hip Hop has no uniform sound to which it adheres. They are, however, the best at their respective crafts. Weezy's good at hormone-exciting, teenage pregnancy rap, while Jay's lane is reminding the 40 & over Hip Hop head that we still count for more than reminiscing about Run DMC & shaking our fists at whipper-snappers.
As long as we have artists who continue to treat Hip Hop as the artistic outlet it was created to be, I don't believe the culture will implode & cease to exist. But in the meantime, beware. Baby's not the only cat that has such an obtuse, skewered view of what dictates penchant. Hell, Jay-Z's not that far removed from the problem himself.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
The Shoving Match
To all the Lil Wayne fans out there, Rebirth will never be released (4 push backs & counting). & here's why;
Drake.
Wayne didn't follow the blueprint (no Jay-Z) laid out by thousands of Rapscallions before him. Hire down. If a cat is noticeably more talented, do not pull him in under you. That's an entertainment industry sin. Really though. But, he saw Drizzy somewhere, heard his flow, decided that he was the next big thing to blow [||] & scooped him up like some much ice cream (pun intended). Thus, he rendered his lollipop rap useless to the millions of 14 year old hot mama's looking for some music to get pregnant to. Plus, Drake looks better [||]. That right there should've tipped Wayne off.......[||]. Although, that would mean he'd have to find a dude less unattractive than he is, which in itself is probably quite the daunting task.
Anyway...
Weeziana wanted to be a Boss, whilst he was still a worker, thus removing his own self from the, umm, throne in the process. At the rate the Young Money train (no Nicki Minaj) is moving, Wayne's million dollar empire isn't guaranteed, like it was last year. If his label isn't at all excited about him venturing out to a new audience, they damn sure aren't going to be excited about him backward hustling his way through a Carter IV. Hence, numerous push backs for "Rebirth", & only baby-step rumors in regards to a supposed Carter IV. Wait, wasn't there supposed to be a Carter IV, full of unreleased songs already? Maybe Drake's knee won't heal, & Wayne won't have to worry about him stepping on his toes anymore. ROLLING over them though, is another post altogether.
Take Eminem. We've all heard the rumors of how he heard about 50, got his hands on a mixtape & just had to sign him. Do you know why Marshall was so adamant? Because Fif already generated a buzz (step 1, word to Federal Ranga) & he knew that there's no way in Hell 50 would ever out-rhyme him. Em gets his cake, & maintains to be (arguably) the flyest White dude in Hip Hop since MC Serch. Hence, hiatus' aplenty, but no push backs. Meanwhile, not even Rick Ross' buoyancy could keep 50 afloat.
"Before I Self Destruct" has been getting pushed back since this time last year. He's had time. He's had resources. One could only speculate on the exact reasons for delay(s), but I put my money on the diminishing buzz & lack of ferocity. To respond to said political complication, 50 did what he does best; took his hustle to the streets (rather, the 'Nets. "War Angel" is a must have). I guess the real question would be, why even go through the hassles of major label drama & woe if one's in a position to go for the gusto by their lonesome? If the ability is there (i.e. finance), why depend on a middle man?
In a climate like this, music-wise, it would seem like E-1 music would be flooded with D.I.Y. rap acts. What better way to avoid the TI side hustles than to take your destiny into your own hands? Not completely independent, but nowhere near the office building frezy one encounters when employed by a roundtable full of overseers (btw, at the very least, Slaughterhouse is in a great position to launch their brand).
It's impossible to be the boss if you have one.
If Tru Life was able to get out of his, umm, Def Jam contract, surely Curtis Jackson can, especially since his commitment's almost up & Interscope is dropping off dead weight like a sinking oceanliner (what's good Banks?). If Young Money is making such Cash Money movement, why do they even need a sign off on an album, rock 'n' roll, R&B, folk, polka or otherwise? Sounds kind of like this "OATH" I've been hearing so much about lately.
Kids, take note; the best way to avoid a push back is to not stand there in the first place. Create your own lane, study Federal Ranga's 5 step plan, pay your dues, your self, & wait for hard work to pay off. But hey, I'm just a writer. What do I know?
**For More, go to http://www.youtube.com/federalranga "XXLmag.com presents Federal Ranga ON YO ASS!! Part IV: Push Back Deez!"**
Drake.
Wayne didn't follow the blueprint (no Jay-Z) laid out by thousands of Rapscallions before him. Hire down. If a cat is noticeably more talented, do not pull him in under you. That's an entertainment industry sin. Really though. But, he saw Drizzy somewhere, heard his flow, decided that he was the next big thing to blow [||] & scooped him up like some much ice cream (pun intended). Thus, he rendered his lollipop rap useless to the millions of 14 year old hot mama's looking for some music to get pregnant to. Plus, Drake looks better [||]. That right there should've tipped Wayne off.......[||]. Although, that would mean he'd have to find a dude less unattractive than he is, which in itself is probably quite the daunting task.
Anyway...
Weeziana wanted to be a Boss, whilst he was still a worker, thus removing his own self from the, umm, throne in the process. At the rate the Young Money train (no Nicki Minaj) is moving, Wayne's million dollar empire isn't guaranteed, like it was last year. If his label isn't at all excited about him venturing out to a new audience, they damn sure aren't going to be excited about him backward hustling his way through a Carter IV. Hence, numerous push backs for "Rebirth", & only baby-step rumors in regards to a supposed Carter IV. Wait, wasn't there supposed to be a Carter IV, full of unreleased songs already? Maybe Drake's knee won't heal, & Wayne won't have to worry about him stepping on his toes anymore. ROLLING over them though, is another post altogether.
Take Eminem. We've all heard the rumors of how he heard about 50, got his hands on a mixtape & just had to sign him. Do you know why Marshall was so adamant? Because Fif already generated a buzz (step 1, word to Federal Ranga) & he knew that there's no way in Hell 50 would ever out-rhyme him. Em gets his cake, & maintains to be (arguably) the flyest White dude in Hip Hop since MC Serch. Hence, hiatus' aplenty, but no push backs. Meanwhile, not even Rick Ross' buoyancy could keep 50 afloat.
"Before I Self Destruct" has been getting pushed back since this time last year. He's had time. He's had resources. One could only speculate on the exact reasons for delay(s), but I put my money on the diminishing buzz & lack of ferocity. To respond to said political complication, 50 did what he does best; took his hustle to the streets (rather, the 'Nets. "War Angel" is a must have). I guess the real question would be, why even go through the hassles of major label drama & woe if one's in a position to go for the gusto by their lonesome? If the ability is there (i.e. finance), why depend on a middle man?
In a climate like this, music-wise, it would seem like E-1 music would be flooded with D.I.Y. rap acts. What better way to avoid the TI side hustles than to take your destiny into your own hands? Not completely independent, but nowhere near the office building frezy one encounters when employed by a roundtable full of overseers (btw, at the very least, Slaughterhouse is in a great position to launch their brand).
It's impossible to be the boss if you have one.
If Tru Life was able to get out of his, umm, Def Jam contract, surely Curtis Jackson can, especially since his commitment's almost up & Interscope is dropping off dead weight like a sinking oceanliner (what's good Banks?). If Young Money is making such Cash Money movement, why do they even need a sign off on an album, rock 'n' roll, R&B, folk, polka or otherwise? Sounds kind of like this "OATH" I've been hearing so much about lately.
Kids, take note; the best way to avoid a push back is to not stand there in the first place. Create your own lane, study Federal Ranga's 5 step plan, pay your dues, your self, & wait for hard work to pay off. But hey, I'm just a writer. What do I know?
**For More, go to http://www.youtube.com/federalranga "XXLmag.com presents Federal Ranga ON YO ASS!! Part IV: Push Back Deez!"**
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Worst Role Model Alive!
I went to a DMV barbecue Saturday. Imagine every stereotype about it's employees, add outdoors & food, &, Boom!, you're there with me. You're welcome.
There was music of course, & now that I'm in recovery (1 year, 4 months & 1 day), shit is especially clear to me. So, I was noticing the abundance of Young Money artists (namely Drake & Lil Wayne) blaring in the background. Maybe it was the speakers, maybe it was the fact that I seem to be the resident babysitter everywhere I go, but I'll be damned if this dude Wayne isn't the most vulgar rapper in the game right now.
Allow me to reiterate; there's nothing wrong with social cursing. Hell, my son does it (& I think it's hi-larry-us), but once you get so graphic with your exploits that you wouldn't play it for your grandmother, children shouldn't be within earshot range of so much obscenity either.
Now, not only was our isolated corner of the park flooded with kids under 14 years of age, but the 9 & up crowd, boys & girls, were doing all the latest dances to Lil Wayne's various descriptions of what he'll do/has done to "pussy". Sans corniness, I was appalled. I couldn't believe that A) these "parents" would allow me, a stranger, to oversee their kids while they got fat & drunk & B) they had that music playing so loud for so long.
Eleventeen year olds doing the 'Reject' to "I wanna fuck every girl" = EPIC FAIL.
Some of these girls, still months away from their first visit from Aunt Flo(w), were singing right along with the dude. At this point, I'm realizing how much Wayne is manufacturing these girls to accept, no, expect themselves to be mere playthings of men; manipulated & tossed aside for the next lucky chap to wipe his genitilia with. The girls were singing his songs, & all the boys were dressed just like him. & although a picture's worth a thousand words, I'm hard pressed to find 950 more words that equate to "ridiculous".
Really though. I was the only parent who saw a flaw in the DJ's attempt at keeping the function cracking. & I'm sure these kids know all the same douche nozzle, trivial trivia about Wayne as I do; The babies, the drugs, the condoning of violence, the total disregard for womankind, & yet, they adhered to his music, unexplicibly. Last year, he was the best rapper alive. Now, he's the worst role model ever.
I've more/less considered myself a casual fan of Wayne's music over the years. I've witnessed flashes of brilliance, I've seen signs of retardation. But, this Drake-flavored second wind he's campaigning right now is Ugh, to the nth degree (yeah, "nth", look it up). I can't co-sign him anymore, simply based off the fact that, judging by his words, he'd try to bone my daughter then kill me if given the chance. No Dice. That syrup & coke has officially turned this cat into a zombie.
I try not to take Rap music too seriously, but, I'll make an exception on this one.
There was music of course, & now that I'm in recovery (1 year, 4 months & 1 day), shit is especially clear to me. So, I was noticing the abundance of Young Money artists (namely Drake & Lil Wayne) blaring in the background. Maybe it was the speakers, maybe it was the fact that I seem to be the resident babysitter everywhere I go, but I'll be damned if this dude Wayne isn't the most vulgar rapper in the game right now.
Allow me to reiterate; there's nothing wrong with social cursing. Hell, my son does it (& I think it's hi-larry-us), but once you get so graphic with your exploits that you wouldn't play it for your grandmother, children shouldn't be within earshot range of so much obscenity either.
Now, not only was our isolated corner of the park flooded with kids under 14 years of age, but the 9 & up crowd, boys & girls, were doing all the latest dances to Lil Wayne's various descriptions of what he'll do/has done to "pussy". Sans corniness, I was appalled. I couldn't believe that A) these "parents" would allow me, a stranger, to oversee their kids while they got fat & drunk & B) they had that music playing so loud for so long.
Eleventeen year olds doing the 'Reject' to "I wanna fuck every girl" = EPIC FAIL.
Some of these girls, still months away from their first visit from Aunt Flo(w), were singing right along with the dude. At this point, I'm realizing how much Wayne is manufacturing these girls to accept, no, expect themselves to be mere playthings of men; manipulated & tossed aside for the next lucky chap to wipe his genitilia with. The girls were singing his songs, & all the boys were dressed just like him. & although a picture's worth a thousand words, I'm hard pressed to find 950 more words that equate to "ridiculous".
Really though. I was the only parent who saw a flaw in the DJ's attempt at keeping the function cracking. & I'm sure these kids know all the same douche nozzle, trivial trivia about Wayne as I do; The babies, the drugs, the condoning of violence, the total disregard for womankind, & yet, they adhered to his music, unexplicibly. Last year, he was the best rapper alive. Now, he's the worst role model ever.
I've more/less considered myself a casual fan of Wayne's music over the years. I've witnessed flashes of brilliance, I've seen signs of retardation. But, this Drake-flavored second wind he's campaigning right now is Ugh, to the nth degree (yeah, "nth", look it up). I can't co-sign him anymore, simply based off the fact that, judging by his words, he'd try to bone my daughter then kill me if given the chance. No Dice. That syrup & coke has officially turned this cat into a zombie.
I try not to take Rap music too seriously, but, I'll make an exception on this one.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Guess Who's H.I.V.+?
Okay, you got me. Your guess is as good (hopefully not better) than mine. But, at some point one has to imagine that we will eventually be reading such a phrase on TMZ.com or (God forbid) MediaTakeOut.com. Frankly, I'm surprised MTO hasn't used some variation of that headline already. They're a pretty low-brow, douche nozzle website. For example, according to MTO, both Bow-Wow & Soulja Boy are closet homo's (with "pictures" to back up the allegations). Hell, I could've told you that based purely off of my keen ability to see. That site is nothing more than a rumor-fueled gossip fest; a bunch of fat, black women who swear they'd do a better job on The View than Whoopi Goldberg (no relation to the wrestler) &/or Star Jones (no relation to Nasir or Knight Rider). Ftr, nobody's fucking with Whoopi though. Unless you're Ted Danson.
Now apparently, Lil Wayne is having two more kids this year, to add to his 20 year old daughter & son he had earlier this year. Not counting the handful he undoubtedly has tucked away somewhere in Magnolia Projects, that brings the (public) total to four. One would gather that he doesn't "stay strapped" as he declares. But, hold that thought...
Supposedly, Man was designed to inseminate. I don't dispute that. It's a natural animal instinct. Just look around & various mammals are bumping uglies with the sole intention of pro-creation. Humans, however, are the only species to do it willingly, for recreational purposes. Like cocaine. Knowing that it's an automatic response, more consideration should be taken when the chance of a hormonal explosion is imminent, kind of like avoiding a bill collector. You KNOW if you answer the phone, no matter what you say, you're going to have to deal with these people asking for money. So, you don't answer. Or, at the very least, you prepare some lame duck excuse ahead of time to get around the situation. That's called preparation. Same rules apply here. Or at least they should.
Dudes must've forgotten what happened to Magic Johnson. & save your "AIDS ain't real!" rhetoric. It's real enough to kill people. Don't tell me shit about a conspiracy. Perhaps Magic's a space alien whose physiology destroys the virus. Maybe he has Michael Jackson's doctor, & takes a molotov cocktail of meds that the average cat isn't privy to. Either or, don't forget the underlying point. He. Caught. Something.
Point is, I'm seeing way too many carefree, willy-nilly pregnancies nowadays. I could go in on the broken home, no Father propaganda, but that's another drop for another day. You could just watch "The Pursuit of Happyness" & glean what you will. Seriously, & I say this as a husband, father & human being....
Go buy some god damned condoms! Really though.
Maybe it's not 1989, & perhaps there's all types of new medicines which allow the infected to live a "normal" life, & maybe folks are under the impression that it's still a "gay disease", but at this point, I suggest you pull your head out of your ass, & wise up. Btw, Black women between the ages of 24-35 have the highest infection rate of the largest group of growing cases, which is coincidentally, Black woman. Quick math problem for you: H.I.V. infected Black Women + frequently incarcerated Black Men = ?. The more I look at that equation, the more I see how the answer could be a number of things, all of which translate to a healthy mix of genocide/suicide.
I'm all for the expansion of bloodlines & the joy of creating life, but remember, shit's real. Just because no one's talking doesn't mean there's nothing to talk about. I'm going to leave you with two words that can make a great deal of difference in your life. At least for the time being...
Prophylactic & Masturbation.
No judgment, I'm just saying.
Now apparently, Lil Wayne is having two more kids this year, to add to his 20 year old daughter & son he had earlier this year. Not counting the handful he undoubtedly has tucked away somewhere in Magnolia Projects, that brings the (public) total to four. One would gather that he doesn't "stay strapped" as he declares. But, hold that thought...
Supposedly, Man was designed to inseminate. I don't dispute that. It's a natural animal instinct. Just look around & various mammals are bumping uglies with the sole intention of pro-creation. Humans, however, are the only species to do it willingly, for recreational purposes. Like cocaine. Knowing that it's an automatic response, more consideration should be taken when the chance of a hormonal explosion is imminent, kind of like avoiding a bill collector. You KNOW if you answer the phone, no matter what you say, you're going to have to deal with these people asking for money. So, you don't answer. Or, at the very least, you prepare some lame duck excuse ahead of time to get around the situation. That's called preparation. Same rules apply here. Or at least they should.
Dudes must've forgotten what happened to Magic Johnson. & save your "AIDS ain't real!" rhetoric. It's real enough to kill people. Don't tell me shit about a conspiracy. Perhaps Magic's a space alien whose physiology destroys the virus. Maybe he has Michael Jackson's doctor, & takes a molotov cocktail of meds that the average cat isn't privy to. Either or, don't forget the underlying point. He. Caught. Something.
Point is, I'm seeing way too many carefree, willy-nilly pregnancies nowadays. I could go in on the broken home, no Father propaganda, but that's another drop for another day. You could just watch "The Pursuit of Happyness" & glean what you will. Seriously, & I say this as a husband, father & human being....
Go buy some god damned condoms! Really though.
Maybe it's not 1989, & perhaps there's all types of new medicines which allow the infected to live a "normal" life, & maybe folks are under the impression that it's still a "gay disease", but at this point, I suggest you pull your head out of your ass, & wise up. Btw, Black women between the ages of 24-35 have the highest infection rate of the largest group of growing cases, which is coincidentally, Black woman. Quick math problem for you: H.I.V. infected Black Women + frequently incarcerated Black Men = ?. The more I look at that equation, the more I see how the answer could be a number of things, all of which translate to a healthy mix of genocide/suicide.
I'm all for the expansion of bloodlines & the joy of creating life, but remember, shit's real. Just because no one's talking doesn't mean there's nothing to talk about. I'm going to leave you with two words that can make a great deal of difference in your life. At least for the time being...
Prophylactic & Masturbation.
No judgment, I'm just saying.
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